A: Actually, I'm glad that we came to Shanghai to perform there, but I'm not particularly happy to bring him. You must know about it.

What do you mean?

Because you know Shanghai. What is this place?

B: Where is it?

A: metropolis, international metropolis

B: That's right.

A: China is the most international place.

B: That's right.

You didn't understand English, so you went to Shanghai? What are you doing here?

B: Just a moment, please.

A: Really, in Shanghainese, this is Bazi.

b； Wait, who told you I can't speak English?

Who else should tell me? You just can't.

We also went to college and learned English.

Did you pass the exam?

Of course I passed the exam.

What grade did you take?

B: Thank you. . . . . What level should I take?

A: Still no good.

No, we didn't study hard when we were in college. After graduation, we spent money on cram schools to learn English for work needs.

A: Which cram school?

Crazy English. I learned it from Li Yang.

A: That's right.

B: What's wrong?

A: I have never studied English, and I am fascinated by optics. I smoke with my family every day.

b； Hit my wife? What have I learned? I tell you, I have no daughter-in-law.

A: Yes, if you don't hit your daughter-in-law, everyone can see it in his face. You play by yourself every day.

B: I'm full.

A: Is it swollen?

B: ok, I won't learn.

ABCDEFG, learn English

B: Stop, what's wrong with you? Why run away?

This is not a run on you.

I know English.

A: Is the field test ok?

B: Whatever.

If it's too difficult, I won't go with you. Can I give you a simple test?

word

A: How many words?

B: it's like giving it away for nothing.

Answer: Test a few words.

B: Help yourself.

What do you think of this English word?

ah

A: Oranges

what to say

A: Oranges

No, you can't even speak Chinese fluently. Will you test me in English? orange

A: It's up to you, orange, orange.

B: Just test this word and ask for a long time.

A: Can oranges talk?

B: Look at orange. That's the end of old London.

You're good at this. The accent of Changning District in London.

B: What do you think of Changning District?

Okay, that's right.

B why do you ask?

Give you another banana test.

Here we go again, bananas, bananas,

A: Say it again.

banana

A: Yes, yes, take the peach test again.

B: peaches

apple

Apple Inc

A: That's it. You missed it.

B: What?

A: so there are four words missing. Is an apple an apple? Everyone here knows that Apple is an IPHONE.

Listen carefully and have a little Parisian accent. IPHONE is like this in old Paris.

This little apple is an IPHONE.

A: What about new york?

B: The iPad is a mess. Which one of us doesn't understand English?

A: The bigger one is the IMAC.

Learning English is like learning digital products.

A: I'm kidding. I know you can speak English.

B: That's right.

A: We know a little English, but when it comes to English, it's sad.

B: What's wrong?

A: Shanghainese and Beijingers. We are all from China.

B: Right.

A: But there are differences and accents between them.

B: Yes, there are dialects.

We can understand each other in English.

B: Right.

A: You said that when it comes to hometown, it is even more different who does business with whom.

B: How can it be different?

A: Listen, these two words are different.

What do you mean?

Shanghai is called commerce.

do business

A: Beijing is called business.

B: Buy one and sell one.

A: It's different to call, and it's different to do business.

You introduce me.

A: Let's take the simplest restaurant that everyone will encounter, but the restaurant where you eat is different.

B: What's the difference?

A: First of all, you have the sauce noodle restaurant in Beijing Jingwei Bowl.

B: Right.

A: Zhanjiang noodle restaurant has a special feature.

B: What are the characteristics?

A: Loud voices make people enthusiastic.

Really? What should we do? Let's study.

A: Yes.

Ok, I'll have dinner then.

A: Can I run with the waiter?

B: ok, let's go to eat when we are hungry.

Oh, hey, the way, there you are.

You know I am here.

A: Please go in.

B: OK.

Are you still sitting in your usual place?

B: I know all about it.

A: Don't sit down yet. I'll dust you off. Are you a friend or a date today?

B: Just me.

A: You are the only one.

B: Right.

A: Did you enjoy your meal?

B: I'm used to it.

A: The same thing.

as usual

I will call you.

All right, come on.

A: Pay attention to the kitchen. When Mr. Chen comes, make 4 mustard mounds, 20 Jin of beef sauce, 40 Jin of elbow sauce and 4 bowls of squeezed noodles.

B: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. How did I sneak in from Afghanistan? Have I ever seen meat? What is this appetite?

A: Just say the enthusiasm is loud and clear.

B: but it's not noisy

A: There's another one.

B: Anything else?

Restaurants in Shanghai

B: What kind of restaurant?

There are many western restaurants in Shanghai, an international metropolis.

B: Right.

A: Western restaurants have one feature.

B: What are the characteristics?

A: Keep your voice down and be polite.

Yes, it's polite.

Shall we learn it for you again?

B: I'll go back to the western restaurant.

Shanghai western restaurant

Ok, ok.

Where do you eat? I'm a waiter in a western restaurant, okay?

Can I have a foreign tourist?

A: OK.

B: I have to eat western food when I get to Shanghai.

A: Hello, sir.

B: That's very polite.

Please eat in it, sir.

B: OK.

A: Please sit down, sir.

Ok, I'll sit down.

What would you like to eat, sir?

Let's start with the first course.

May I recommend a Caesar salad as the first course, sir?

B: What's wrong?

A: Caesar salad

Who did you kill?

Sir, you are so humorous. Caesar salad is a cold first course, in which vegetables and ham are mixed with salad dressing.

B: This is the name of a dish, isn't it?

A: Right.

Okay, so Caesar killed someone.

Ok, Caesar salad is your first course. What kind of soup do you want? We have cream potato soup and roasted mushroom soup.

B: Just an orange and mushroom soup.

A: Roasted mushroom soup.

B: This is orange mushroom soup with oranges in it.

Sir, your speech is really humorous.

Really?

Ok, I'll write you a roast mushroom soup. What do you want for your staple food?

B: A steak, please.

A: How would you like your steak?

B: I hope it is 330% raw.

A: Is Seven Mature?

B: Medium rare, then medium rare.

Sir, this is 90%. How to use 10%?

I gave you a tip.

We also serve dessert after dinner, sir. Do you think it's ok to eat Italian tiramisu?

B: What tila rice noodles?

Chocolate cake

Chocolate cake, right?

A: Is that all right?

B: Great. Let's come up together.

Do you prefer coffee or black tea?

Do you have a pot with a handle?

Yes, sir, you have remembered everything you ordered. Please sit down for a while, and we'll bring your food up.

B: OK, you can tell me how much it costs first.

A: A * * * is 7640 yuan.

B: Hehe, it's so expensive.

A: Because translation costs are high.

B: What a mess.

A: That's what I mean. He has a deep voice and is polite. Even if he killed you, he whispered 7640 yuan.

Look, I don't think this is good. Although I am from Beijing and live in the north, to be honest, after I came to Shanghai, you just said that I like the atmosphere of that western restaurant very much.

Really?

I think our northern restaurants should learn from our Shanghai restaurants.

You're fooling around.

What do you mean fooling around?

A: How can a restaurant with a northern style put western food as a waiter? That's impossible.

B: It looks so human. Our northern restaurant is based on our Shanghai restaurant.

Don't you believe it?

I believe.

A: Don't believe that we are studying now.

B: Go to school now

What do you like to eat in Beijing?

I like Baoding donkey meat.

A: OK, let's replace the waiter in Baoding Donkey Roasting Hall with the waiter in a western restaurant. Do you think you are awkward?

B: How can it be embarrassing?

A: Do it again.

B: that's great.

A: Do it again.

B: Eat donkey meat and burn it.

Can I help you, sir? what can I do for you?

Don't speak English.

A: Please come in, sir. Please sit down. What would you like to eat, sir?

I can't eat anything anymore. It's terrible. Stop speaking English.

Sir, let me especially recommend today's chef's signature.

B: I also recommend it to be ugly.

A: How about that?

B: A cold dish.

A: Cold dishes are the first course.

This is the first course.

Please order the first course, sir.

B: What's there?

A: There is a Bordeaux-style tofu with cucumber and radish skin.

B: Tofu brain is still French, right? What, a bowl of donkey soup?

Do you want cream donkey ribs soup, roast donkey ribs soup or potato donkey ribs soup?

B: Isn't that the smell of horse urine in the cream donkey soup? What do I need it for? A plate of donkey meat with sauce

A: How would you like your donkey meat?

B: Either you gave birth to it or you put something in the sauce. Why don't you just give me nothing? Give me two donkeys to burn.

A: Sir, since the combination of Chinese and western, donkey meat has never been over-heated.

What are you selling now?

Now we sell colorful four seasons donkey meat pizza.

B: Donkey meat pizza

Colorful four season donkey meat pizza

B: What do you call Four Seasons Donkey Pizza?

A: Of course, four kinds of fillings, donkey liver, donkey viscera, white sausage, fresh coriander and green pepper, and thick cheese curling will make you smell the pure Mediterranean flavor.

B: Is this the Mediterranean or Beidaihe? What is that smell?

Is this appropriate?

I can't.

These are the differences between Beijing and Shanghai. Of course, there is really no difference between Beijing and Shanghai in an industry.

B: What industry makes no difference?

A: There is no difference since ancient times.

B: What's the difference?

A: Beyond A: 360 lines

B: What industry?

thief

Thieves and pickpockets

A: Especially now that the society is developed and the internet is developed, thieves have nothing to do with forums.

B: It's also a forum.

Answer: Exchange advanced theft experience. Boy, how powerful thieves are now.

B: How awesome?

A: The thief of our security door can open a community with one instant noodle.

What kind of instant noodles is this? Do you still want to eat?

A: It's hard to soak Mengniu's milk.

Come on, don't run on others.

A: Isn't it?

Did I piss you off?

A: I can start a community, but some people are unreasonable.

Really?

A: There are such low-rise buildings on the sixth floor and the fifth floor in Beijing and Shanghai. There is such a community with six floors, one unit and one staircase, and two households are 12 households.

B: 12 households

A: There are so many residents in 1 1 who are guarding the security fence on the window.

Protective fence

A: I heard that thieves in that community have installed all the guardrails, except one household.

B: This family is in trouble.

A: A week later, all the 1 1 households with guardrails were poked open by thieves with instant noodles.

B: Ah, the guardrail was stolen.

A: That one didn't install it, and there was no loss at all.

You got it?

A: I don't know what happened here. When I went to work in the morning, I opened the door and saw a letter on the ground. The thief left it for him. When I saw the letter, it was eight words.

B: What does it say?

You trust me. I trust you.

I haven't heard of it.