2. The cashier said: There is no change. Here are two plastic bags for you!
3. My advantages are: I am handsome; But my shortcoming is that I am not handsome.
4. What is happiness? Happiness is that cats eat fish, dogs eat meat, and Altman hits small monsters!
5: My life has both sides A and B, and yours has both sides S and B..
6: I am a fat man, not a boor.
7: If Taiwan Province doesn't recover, I won't pass Grade 4!
8: If the sun doesn't come out, I won't go to work; If I come out, I'll go back to sleep!
9: Snail running wildly.
10: Picking up girls is like hanging up QQ. Coax her for 2 hours every day, and it will soon be sunny.
1 1: Talking about money doesn't hurt feelings, but talking about feelings hurts money the most.
12: I curse you for buying instant noodles all your life without seasoning packets.
13: The accountant said, "Come and get your salary later. I don't have any change here."
14: Can you see that I am powdered?
15: Although you are wearing cologne, I can still vaguely smell scum.
16: My name is Rain and my nickname is Runtu.
17: I am an angel, and I can't go back to heaven because of my weight.
18: once I went out on the street, a group of girls stopped me. They said I was handsome, but I denied it, so they hit me and called me hypocritical.
19: it is both house and rotten, and its future is uncertain.
20: Make a cup of Sanlu and give XX a drink.
2 1: The most mysterious department in history: relevant departments.
It is undeniable that mosaic is the biggest obstacle to the progress of human nude art in this century!
There are only two things I can't do in my life: neither this nor that.
24: People have backgrounds, while I have backgrounds.
25: the ideal of meat, the life of cabbage.
26: White Horse … Where have you died! Did you lose the prince and dare not come to see me?
27: Did your mother throw people away and raise the placenta when she gave birth to you?
28: Don't treat shrimp as seafood.
29: Please have a Yangzhou fried rice, more chopped green onion, less salt and an egg, and pack it and take it away.
30: Your mother is your father's cousin?
3 1: I have to read the Forbes rich list every morning when I get up. If my name is not on it, I will go to work.
32: There are too many liars, and fools are obviously not enough.
33: I just killed the dragon on the road, swam across the river and climbed to the top of the tower to kiss your princess.
34: Kill you with what, my love.
35: Your mobile phone is cheaper than the phone bill.
36: It's a long way to go in Xiu Yuan, so let's take a taxi.
37: others pretend to be rich in experience.
38: I am not afraid of stealing tools, but I am afraid that stealing children knows technology!
1. Money is not the problem, but no money!
2. I won't accept anyone when I'm drunk, so I'll hold the wall!
I am like a fly lying on the glass, with a bright future, but I can't find a way out.
4. Do you know, big brother? The meat of the second brother is now more expensive than that of the master.
If eating more fish can nourish the brain and make people smarter, then you must eat at least a pair of whales ...
6. When the water is clear, there is no fish, and when people are mean, they are invincible.
7. Youth is like toilet paper. You can see a lot of it, but it is not enough to use it. 8. Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time for people to see it.
9. Friends around me, be famous quickly, so that my memoirs can sell well ~ ~ ~
10. Colleagues may be nervous when they go to see customers. As soon as they open their mouths, they say, "Hello, Mr. Liu, what's your name?" Sweat ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
1 1. A female classmate is a little dark, and her boyfriend is a little white. One day, the queen of poison tongue in the dormitory suddenly said to her, "You can't do this, you will give birth to zebras."
12. I always treat handsome guys and money like dirt, and they always treat me like this.
13. Don't be lazy with me, I'm too lazy to compete with you.
14. I'm not a casual person. I'm not a casual person.
15. God said that there should be light, and I said I opposed it. Since then, there has been darkness in the world.
16. I'm in a bad mood today. I only have four sentences to say, including this one and the previous two. I'm done. ......
17. To be a man, you must be a person who wanders between cow A and cow C.
18. My first name is God, my second name is Jesus, my English name is God, and my dharma number is Tathagata. ...
19. People can't hang themselves from a tree, but try to die several times in several nearby trees.
20. If you don't skin a tree, you will die. People are shameless and invincible in the world.
2 1. The farmer's three punches hurt a little.
22. In fact, I have always been very popular: when I was a child, everyone loved me, but now I am a bitch.
23. Not afraid of enemies like tigers, but afraid of teammates like pigs.
Go your own way and let others take a taxi.
25. Rats carry knives and look for cats all over the street.
26. As long as you work hard, you shit seriously.
27. Who runs fastest in China? It's Cao Cao (not Liu Xiang). Because speaking of the devil.
28. Get out of here as far as your thoughts go.
29. Only when there is a long queue at the railway station can we truly realize that we are "descendants of the dragon".
30. Lovers make families.
3 1. Spring has come, and a flock of wild geese are flying north, forming a B shape for a while and a T shape for a while. ..
32. Lie down where you fall.
33. You treat me like HELLO KITTY if the tiger doesn't show off its power!
34. Donkeys can read it backwards and forwards ~
◆ Women are plump, thin, slim, tall, slender, short and petite; Men are fat, pigs are thin, ribs are tall, bamboo poles are short, and winter melon ◆ Professor: 90% of adult women in China are not virgins. The President sent a letter to other women 10%. Have you heard of this? The girls shook their heads. "So you didn't get the letter!" ◆ "How much do you love me?" "As much as a dime." "Is that all?" "Isn't a dime a ten?" You are very creative. It is your courage to live. Ugliness is not your intention. God lost his temper. If you live, who will set off the beauty of the world without you!
0 1. The early bird catches the worm, and the early worm is eaten by the bird!
02. Arguing with MM about whether a whale is a fish, I finally said, "I also bring a personal word", and she agreed that a whale is not a fish.
03. The iron pestle can be ground into a needle, but the wooden pestle can only be ground into a toothpick. The material is wrong, and it is useless to try again.
If reply was a virtue, I would have become a saint.
05. Life can't be like cooking. You can't cook until all the ingredients are ready.
06. I heard that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually ran naked in too many cooks for 20 years!
07. Wear other people's shoes, go your own way and let them find it by taxi.
08. There is an old legend that people who can see beautiful women in XX campus will live forever ...
09. Can eggs from all over the world unite to break stones? ! So be realistic ...
10. Not afraid of enemies like tigers, but afraid of teammates like pigs!
1 1. Summer is just not good. When I was poor, I didn't even have to drink the northwest wind ...
12. I once had a pair of wings, but I didn't use them to soar in the sky, but put them in a pot to stew soup ...
13. When the water is clear, there is no fish, and when people are mean, they are invincible!
14. I am not a casual person. I am not a casual person.
15. Today, a group of Japanese people visited our school-to be honest, this is the first time I have seen Japanese people wearing clothes!
16. How far your thoughts are, how far you roll! ! !
17. I am poor, so are my servants, my gardener and my driver ...
18. When the bank charges, it says, "This is in line with international practice!" When serving, he said, "We should consider China's national conditions!"
19. It is not necessarily a prince riding a white horse, he may be Tang Priest; The one with wings is not necessarily an angel, he may be a bird man.
20. Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time for people to see it.
2 1. Stand higher and pee farther.
22. The minimum goal of a college student: a peasant woman, a mountain spring and a little field.
23. My friend's name in his girlfriend's mobile phone is "He", and then they broke up and became "It" ...
24. Don't look for me if there is nothing, let alone if there is something!
25. Do you think I will watch you die? I'll close my eyes!
26. The Buddha said, "It took 500 times to look back in the past life to get a pass in this life." I would rather pass by once in the world for 500 times in this life.
27. What can I do to kill your lover ...
28. The Internet is like a prison. You stole a wallet to get in, but you will learn everything when you go out.
29. Angels can fly because they look down on themselves ...
30. I want to puppy love, but it's too late ...
3 1. Teacher! Just follow the old woman!
32.i love you! What do you care?
33. There is no limit to learning the sea, and turning back is the shore!
34. Life is fun, because life is always fucking playing with me!
I only trust two people in this world, one is me and the other is not you.
36. I don't know whose wife is in my bed, and my wife doesn't know whose bed she is in!
37. I really want to personally call your grandfather: Dad!
38. Beijing University of Science and Technology cheated me for four years, so I plan to cheat the society with the knowledge taught by Beijing University of Science and Technology for life!
39. Friends around me, hurry up and become famous, so that my memoirs can sell well ~ ~ ~
40. When you put on the wedding dress of love, I also put on the monk's cassock ...
4 1. Never seen such a disgusting school-set the mid-term exam on May 8th! ! ! (hidden)
42. House prices are getting higher and higher, so there are fewer and fewer good men ...
43. If I become emperor, I will make you a prince!
44. My friend's name in his girlfriend's mobile phone is "He", and then they broke up and became "It" ...
45. I have never been reduced to an excellent college student, relying on strong quality!
46. Shit, I've been complained! The client said that the mp3 file I gave him had no image!
47. Life is sometimes like being * * * by a eunuch-resistance is pain, and non-resistance is still pain!
48. Reduce the number of boys behind each girl to six!
49. It rains in the east and rains in the west, and my tutor is heartless and affectionate. So I will fight with my classmates in the exam!
50. Hugging is really a strange thing. We are so close, but we can't see each other's faces.
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1 dinosaur said: "When you meet a pervert, you are in no hurry; Meet animals, enjoy slowly ... "
If you can' t find a dinosaur, use a lizard top.
Guan Yu, with a long moustache, is personable, carrying a dragon crescent moon blade, and the Jianghu people gave him the nickname-Dao Lang.
Men and women are just animals of desire after all! Can it really be combined because of love? Sorry, I don't know. .
Don't step on the wildflowers on the roadside.
6 Eating and ml are the primary productive forces.
Menstruation is not only the pain of women, but also the pain of men.
When is the time to embrace each other? I am watching the fun.
Yesterday, Tie Hua smiled at me, making me count sheep at night, one sheep, two sheep and three sheep ...
10 When you grow up, marry Tang Priest as your husband, play if you can, and eat him if you can't.
1 1 a man may love you or not if he has an impulse, but he definitely doesn't love if he doesn't have an impulse!
12 stands higher and urinates farther.
13 female, sweet tooth, very fat! The woman has a hobby: she hates ants and kills them when she sees them. Ask him the old saying: this little thing loves sweets so much and has such a thin waist!
14 break the wife's lifelong system and implement the aunt's shareholding system. Introduce miss competition system and promote lover contract system.
15 On a crowded bus, a girl suddenly cried, Stop crowding! Stop squeezing! Squeeze out all the milk! She is holding yogurt.
16 I'm not in the Jianghu, but there are my legends in the Jianghu.
17 I am in Jianghu, but there is no legend of me in Jianghu.
18 If I irrigate, call me "Theory of Three Represents" for not learning well.
19 If reply was a virtue, I would have become a saint!
Sleep is an art-no one can stop me from pursuing art!
2 1 The rice is in the pot and I am in bed * _ *
Love is countless meals, and marriage is a meal.
Come on, MM, let's go to become a butterfly ...
Love the environment, everyone is sick.
Love-not an idea, love-is made! !
If you love her, please do painless abortion for her!
I never write wording, but I write interchangeable words!
Effect of contraception: If you don't succeed, you will become a "person".
Erection is not everything, but it is absolutely impossible to get an erection!
Don't hang yourself from a tree, try to die several times in several nearby trees ~
3 1 Don't sleep in class, just get drunk on the wine table.
32 looks really creative, and lives really bravely!
No one has stepped on my head since I turned into shit.
34 ugly, but ugly is special, that is, especially ugly!
Wear other people's shoes, go your own way and let them find it.
Don't you know that bed exercise can also lose weight?
It is forbidden to urinate and defecate here, and offenders will confiscate tools.
38 reading and reading the cramp, Wensi can be like a urine collapse!
39 Buddha said, color is empty, and empty is color! Tonight, I want to be free.
The reason why many female stars are not popular is that they don't open their legs * _ *
4 1 it's better to spend money "on the day" than to spend money on the moon! *^_^*
42 explanation is cover-up, and cover-up is making up stories!
The extreme of 43 classics is fine spots! ! !
God, did you let summer and winter share a room? Give birth to this damn weather!
45 vulnerabilities and patches Qi Fei, blue screen * * * crash color!
46 A beautiful woman who leaves before holding her body often makes a satyr cry. . . . . .
Take a breath in 47 and practice a fart outside.
48 men can live, sows can climb trees!
The IQ of a man cheating is second only to Einstein!
Your ugliness has nothing to do with your face. . . . . .
5 1. Actually, I am a genius, but it's a pity that I envy talents!
Life can't be like cooking. You can't cook until all the ingredients are ready!
What matters in life is not the position you stand, but the direction you face!
Since ancient times, no one has died in life, and you don't need paper to shit!
If you can't tell your tutor clearly, then confuse him!
If I have a pair of eyes to cry with, it is worth my suffering for my life.
57 when hardware can also COPY!
Life is fun, because life is always fucking playing with me!
All unforgettable love is the moment when the soul drifts in bed!
60 days fall, you hold it, I hold it!
6 1 Listen to your words and save me ten books!
Take off your clothes, I am an animal. Put on your clothes, I am devil wears prada!
Study hard for China! A pack of Chinese is a lot of money ~ ~ ~
My id is fake, so don't believe that I am a liar.
My mother always said that our family wouldn't be so poor without a telephone.
I like children, and I like the process of making children more!
I lost a penny by the road!
It's raining, don't forget to take an umbrella. If you are wet, gonorrhea will be troublesome.
The art of self-cultivation is actually the art of lying.
There is no limit to learning the sea, and turning back is the shore!
7 1 a temporary impulse, a crisis for future generations!
I'm not a casual person, but if you want to be casual, I'll do whatever you want!
73 have something to do as a secretary, nothing to do as a secretary!
Keep pace with the times, you and I * * * go to the climax!
As long as it's not dirty, we are the mainstream!
Only the fakes are real, and everything else is fake!
77 E network is deeply in love, holding hands with e network. Go your own way and let others take a taxi.
78 students, easy. Live, easy. Life is not easy.
Rogues are not terrible, but they are afraid of being educated.
80 things to do with sex, people to mate with.
8 1 Who was I before I was born and who was I after I was born?
Death teaches everything, just like the results announced after the exam-although it suddenly dawned, it was too late ~!
If you don't go bad in debauchery, you will pervert in silence!
I walked through my youth and got blisters on my feet.
Businessmen don't know how to hate their country and prostitutes don't know about extramarital affairs.
Animals have a little pity, but I have none, so I am not an animal.
All men are created equal, except those who get married.
Exercise muscles to prevent being beaten!
After watching all the porn in the world, I naturally have no code in my heart ~
If dinosaurs were people, what was that person?
9 1 No one who is more talented than me is as handsome as me, and no one who is more handsome than me is as talented as me!
Without a passionate kiss, how can you roll on the bed?
Don't fill a small pit without irrigation, and don't fill it with a large pit.
94 with two pieces and a mind of 5 million!
95 explanation is cover-up, cover-up is equal to no Excellence, no Excellence is better than going home and having a rest! ! !
I really want to call your grandfather by myself: Dad!
The principle of microcomputer is in crisis, the random process is random, the real variable function is learned ten times, and the assembly language can't be compiled!
Without porn, sex education in China would be a blank!
There are very few women that men think are suitable for them before marriage, and many women that are suitable for them after marriage.
100 Life is a lost opportunity, but it's easier to meet each other. Tell the truth, who doesn't love money? 1. Push me again, and I'll pretend to be dead for you!
2. I not only have a car, but also have my own!
3. I'll buy it for you if you like ... (after realizing each other's anger) Oh, no, it's "Brother, I'll buy it for you!"
There are so many people who despise me, who are you?
I won't tell you if you kill me, but you haven't made a beautiful plan yet!
6. Not only am I lucky, but my beriberi is also good!
7. The mirror always reflects light!
8. Does handsome have a P? Maybe it was eaten by pawns!
9. Give it to me and you don't have to worry. There is nothing wrong!
10. Relax, I'm not a good person. ......
1 1. Don't worry that something will happen to my girlfriend following me-as long as she lays eggs all her life, we will break them immediately and never let the principal and parents know!
12. Don't thank me, how dare I charge you money after thanking you!
13. Don't tell me to bring it on-I'm Avanti!
14. If you ignore me, I'll be a dog!
15. When will there be a bright moon? Ask Yi Zhongtian!
16. I can't reach it. Try stepping on my right foot with my left foot.
17. Some people are alive and she is dead. Some people are alive and he should have died!
18. You said ... you like me? Actually ... at first ... actually, I also ... well, I told you, actually, I liked myself.
19. Do you drink water, drink water or drink water? Take your pick!
20. Castle Peak is still there, only a little red.
2 1. Hey, say what you should, and whisper what you shouldn't.
22. Can you say stealing about a scholar?
23. Damn it, don't ask such questions to single men!
24. Zi once said: Don't take my tolerance for you as your shameless capital!
25. Don't think I'm out of reach just because I'm handsome. In fact, I'm a sea of rivers.
26. It's a nice day, windy and rainy.
27. As a typical failure, you are really successful!
I really want to kill this bug, but my tongue is not long enough. ...
29. Three cobblers' feet stink and one Zhuge Liang dies.
30. In this golden autumn with red leaves and maple leaves. ......
3 1. One cut thyroid hormone, one not.
32. If you bother me again, I'll tie you to the straw boat and borrow an arrow!
33. The wind is rustling and the water is cold. If you owe money, you have to pay it back!
34.A: where to eat? I have no money.
B: Let's go out to the restaurant. It's on me-the hose.
35. See if there is anything left behind?
36. I have a green dragon on my left and a Mickey Mouse tattooed on my waist. 38.A: It's hard to swallow this evil spirit without revenge.
B: Then how can I make you die?
40. She is so fat that my thigh can't twist her arm.
4 1.
42. The world belongs to us and our sons, but in the end it belongs to the grandchildren.
43. I'll do my homework!
44.A: Have you done your homework?
B: yes! Well, it's still warm under the P stock ... Do you want it? Then here you are.
45. Who is sitting in the village today? He doesn't even clean the blackboard!
46. How much is a catty of these shoes?
47. I was really blind at the beginning. ...
48. Is this blind man blind?
2. I not only have a car, but also have my own!
3. I'll buy it for you if you like ... (after realizing each other's anger) Oh, no, it's "Brother, I'll buy it for you!"
There are so many people who despise me, who are you?
I won't tell you if you kill me, but you haven't made a beautiful plan yet!
6. Not only am I lucky, but my beriberi is also good!
7. The mirror always reflects light!
8. Does handsome have a P? Maybe it was eaten by pawns!
9. Give it to me and you don't have to worry. There is nothing wrong!
10. Relax, I'm not a good person. ......
1 1. Don't worry that something will happen to my girlfriend following me-as long as she lays eggs all her life, we will break them immediately and never let the principal and parents know!
12. Don't thank me, how dare I charge you money after thanking you!
13. Don't tell me to bring it on-I'm Avanti!
14. If you ignore me, I'll be a dog!
15. When will there be a bright moon? Ask Yi Zhongtian!
16. I can't reach it. Try stepping on my right foot with my left foot.
17. Some people are alive and she is dead. Some people are alive and he should have died!
18. You said ... you like me? Actually ... at first ... actually, I also ... well, I told you, actually, I liked myself.
19. Do you drink water, drink water or drink water? Take your pick!
20. Castle Peak is still there, only a little red.
2 1. Hey, say what you should, and whisper what you shouldn't.
22. Can you say stealing about a scholar?
23. Damn it, don't ask such questions to single men!
24. Zi once said: Don't take my tolerance for you as your shameless capital!
25. Don't think I'm out of reach just because I'm handsome. In fact, I'm a sea of rivers.
26. It's a nice day, windy and rainy.
27. As a typical failure, you are really successful!
I really want to kill this bug, but my tongue is not long enough. ...
29. Three cobblers' feet stink and one Zhuge Liang dies.
30. In this golden autumn with red leaves and maple leaves. ......
3 1. One cut thyroid hormone, one not.
32. If you bother me again, I'll tie you to the straw boat and borrow an arrow!
33. The wind is rustling and the water is cold. If you owe money, you have to pay it back!
34.A: where to eat? I have no money.
B: Let's go out to the restaurant. It's on me-the hose.
35. See if there is anything left behind?
36. I have a green dragon on my left and a Mickey Mouse tattooed on my waist. 38.A: It's hard to swallow this evil spirit without revenge.
B: Then how can I make you die?
40. She is so fat that my thigh can't twist her arm.
4 1.
42. The world belongs to us and our sons, but in the end it belongs to the grandchildren.
43. I'll do my homework!
44.A: Have you done your homework?
B: yes! Well, it's still warm under the P stock ... Do you want it? Then here you are.
45. Who is sitting in the village today? He doesn't even clean the blackboard!
46. How much is a catty of these shoes?