If you choose to forgive, you will not be able to overcome your heart and choose divorce. Because you have children, in short, in your partner's heart, a liar is a piece of RMB that falls into a pit. It's a pity that your nausea hasn't disappeared.
But anyway, life goes on. If you choose to forgive, accept it sincerely and don't bring up the past again. But there is a key premise, that is, the liar sincerely repents and can stand the test of his partner.
I made a bad promise verbally, but I broke contact with my old lover in secret.
Hello, sister Li. My wife has cheated me many times. What should I do? She and I were introduced. We are eight years older than her. When I saw that she was a little girl in the country and dressed quite simply, I thought she should be a living woman. Unexpectedly, after marriage, he often refused to share a room with me. I thought she was younger than me, maybe she didn't adapt to this aspect and didn't take it seriously. Later, when she had children, it was even more inconvenient, almost once every few months.
When the child was over two years old, she had to go out to work, and the child was sent to his parents for help. She thought they finally had a space to be alone, but she held back.
I often have a good communication with her, but it hasn't changed. A few months ago, when she was taking a shower, the mobile phone came to WeChat. I took a look and found that she was having an ambiguous conversation with a boy.
I asked her who this was. She said that my former friend, I definitely don't want it, and told her that it broke my heart, but she said that I made a mountain out of a molehill, so she lost her temper with me.
My personality is a little weak. Finally, I married my daughter-in-law, and I took a bride price of 200,000 yuan, especially for fear that she would run away. I'm really more afraid of what will happen.
One morning, she asked me to go downstairs and buy her bread, which only took 10 minutes. When I came back, there was no one there. I can't make all the calls. I have to ask my mother-in-law. There's no hurry.
The next day, she turned on the phone and said that she was going home for a trip. I know she's lying. There must be other men around, but there is no evidence and she didn't say anything. I hope she will come back soon.
After a few days, I finally came back, but I kept my cell phone with me. I don't think so. I can't ask a few days later, she lied about going out to look for a job. I followed him and found him in the hotel with the boy. I dare not go in and wait outside.
When she came out, I asked who this person was. She said she was just a friend. I can't talk about divorce. She quickly let go of the boy. When she got home, she apologized and knelt down to make sure that this would not happen again.
I forgave her and changed her cell phone number. She secretly told the boy that they changed from WeChat to other ways and kept chatting and having meetings when I was away.
I couldn't take it anymore, so I filed for divorce. She cried and said, have pity on her, don't divorce, or her parents will kill her and tell me that the boy knew her before we got married.
They are lovers, because their parents think he has no money, so they separated. Can such a wife still be wanted? Can she really change her mind? In fact, I don't want a divorce, and I don't want to spend money on bride price, but what should I do now?
The first point of Li Jie's emotional analysis: You got married for the sake of marriage, and she got married because of her parents' orders. There are no feelings between you, and there will be many problems in a marriage that is not based on feelings, but there are also many marriages that get married first and then fall in love, and there are also happy marriages.
But why not? Because your wife had a sweetheart before she married you, she resisted you and thought of that man.
Even if you are a stove, you can't warm her cold heart.
The second point: most women who are infected with extramarital affairs find it difficult to quit.
Most women who have extramarital affairs will not look back, because their bodies and minds are inseparable. Women are emotional. When they fall in love with a man, they will be willing to cheat physically. On the contrary, few women cheat physically.
But it is not absolute. Some women who have extramarital affairs will really return to their families, but your wife is different from them. Her heart is not in you.
So once tempted, it's hard to take it to heart. Her repeated betrayals are the best explanation.
The third point: it is easy to forgive, but difficult to trust again.
trong & gt
Forgiveness is easier said than done. Trust in marriage is like the foundation of a house. The foundation is unstable, and the house will collapse one day.
Would it be better to flip the lid again? Not necessarily. You have to see if the foundation is suitable for building a house. If that place is not suitable for foundation, it is a mud depression, and even the best materials are useless.
Just like your marriage, she never loved you. No matter how much sincerity you pay, she won't feel it. Besides, there are already lovers outside. Do you think she will change her mind?
Fourth point: I'd rather do it for the bride price. Is there happiness?
In your mind, happiness is more important or money is more important? Many people may say that both are important and undeniable, and the choice is good. However, in a dilemma, if you can only choose one, you must choose one that can be fulfilled and has a future.
If you don't divorce, you have to accept that she has cheated on you many times, because you can't make her really fall in love with you, and your marriage can only be reconciled.
There is hope when there is divorce. If she doesn't cherish you, someone will cherish you for her. As for the bride price, you can't get it back until you leave.
All in all, I don't think your marriage is very good. If you want to get it back, unless your wife really loves you, you really forgive it, not for the bride price and children.
I'm sister Li. If you have an emotional story, come to me.
And how to get there?