(Swinging to the student union)
Freshmen: "Wow! As soon as you enter the door is is the study department, our school is really still focused on studying!"
Student cadres: (freshmen just entered the door and ran into the head of the study department, only to see her holding a book of poems over there full of emotion recitation) "The bright moonlight in front of the bed, suspected to be frost on the ground. Raise your head to look at the moon, lower your head to think of your hometown!" (Khan ！！！！！)
Freshman: (applauding towards him, of course said in a flattering tone) "I think this must be the Minister of Learning! Greetings, young student!!!" (Both hands make a bow)
School cadres: "Oh, yes, I am the minister of the study department, who claims to gather the best study cadres in the whole school! (smugly) I wonder what this man can do for you?"
Freshman: "I'm here to apply for a job as a cadre in the student union, and as soon as I came in, I was attracted by your voice, so I'll apply for a job in your department first! I don't know what are the requirements to be a cadre?"
Student cadre: "Dared, dared, dared! I'm sure you're very ambitious, but I can't say I have any conditions, I just need some basic things." (Shen hand hand positive and negative look down)
Freshman: "What things?" (a face of curiosity, looking to her hand)
School cadre: "(face the audience) for example, academic performance should be ranked in the top ten in the whole school, in fact, I am the first in the whole year, so I will relax the requirements of you, this is the most important; (blowing fingernails) and then you need to know a musical instrument, such as the piano or the flute, I know three kinds of musical instruments Oh! (Turned to the freshman, looked at him still, and then turned to the audience) so on you relax the requirements; of course, there is like me the ability to appreciate the arts, (Freshman heard this immediately vomit-like, ran off the stage) There is no need to be as poetic as I am, but to have and I have the same hobbies. The last is ...... Huh? Where are the people?"
(did not wait for him to finish, the freshman is surprisingly already nowhere to be found)
Student cadre: "How is it that nowadays the students are so impatient ah, forget it, (reciting tone) even if the Ministry is just me, I can also hold up a piece of the sky! I am really too poetic! HOHOHOHO!The light of the moon in front of the bed is suspected to be the frost on the ground ......" (reads aloud and walks off the stage)
Freshmen: "(Runs up to face the audience) Wow! I did not expect the study department actually have such a narcissist ah, was selected if not miserable! Go to another department. Huh? There's a girl's section in the student council? I wonder if this department is close to MM?" (A rather lewd expression appeared)
Female cadre: (Seeing someone outside the door, she walked out and asked) "This student, how can I help you? I'm the head of the girls' department of the student council."
Freshman: "(whispering and trailing off) Wow! The girls' department really does have a hidden beauty. Ah, big sister, I'm here to apply for a job as a student council officer."
Female cadre: "Oh, welcome, welcome, may I ask which department's cadre you want to apply for?"
Freshman: "This?... Hey! Just your girls' department!"
Female cadre: (facing the audience) "Ah? But we've never had a male cadre in the girls' department? Because many of the work of our department are centered on female students, all in order to let the girls have a better learning and living environment, you a boy ......"
Freshmen (frantic, suddenly want to open): "big sister, this is not true! In ancient times, there are Shang Yang changed the law, today there is the United States attacked Iraq, everything has exceptions, everything seeks innovation. I always harbor a meticulous care for girls, the girl's problem, is my problem, the girl's heart (as flirtatious), is my heart, big sister! For the happiness of hundreds of girls in our school, you, let me join the girls' department ......" (kneel down on one knee, be decisive)
Female cadre: "... Well well well, I'm convinced YOU, our department will make an exception and accept you as a male cadre. Then you will come with me now to solve an urgent girl problem ......"
Freshman: "Oh? What problem?"
Female cadre: "Alas, although we girls usually love to talk and laugh, (the image of two girls laughing and joking appeared on the side of the stage) but sometimes we also fall out a little bit of conflict, this is not it, the two sophomore girls because of a little bit of a small thing now quarreled ......" (start to quarrel, do not make a sound, but to show the intense point, is suddenly happened)
Freshman: "Hey, is not just a girl quarrel? I'm going to fix it ......" (just wanted to go, was pulled back)
Female cadre: "Wait .... You don't know, our girls' problems can be small or big, if you don't handle it well, they might ......"
Freshman (scared): "What will... What will happen..." (together look to the two girls on the side of the stage)
Women cadres: "grab your hair (freshmen cooperate as head-hugging), hook your nostrils (cover your nose), tear your clothes ......" (At this time the two people on the side of the stage, female cadres say what they will do according to what, to create laughter)
Freshmen: "(hands blocking the chest) Wow! Molestation!!!"
Female cadre: "You're scared"
Freshman: "Ah ...... No no... I this dress is Metersbonwe, this problem? It is not suitable for a boy like me, it is better to leave it to you girls to solve it yourselves! I'll go first ......"
Female cadre: "Hey! Don't go ah! We girls need you ......" (chases the freshman off the stage and comes back when he's almost to the edge of the stage and says to the audience, "Hey, it's better if I solve the girls' problems myself!" (He then walks over to the two girls and says something to them before the three of them get off the stage together)
Freshman: (Running up to the stage once again) "These girls are such a pain in the ass! Forget it, let's go back to the other section."
Law Officer: (appearing from the other side) "Ugh ......"
Freshman: "Huh? Why is this big brother lamenting? Could it be that it's also about girl problems?"
Labor Officer: "Oh! No no, I'm the head of the labor student department. (To the audience) so that everyone in an elegant campus life, in a bright and clean classroom to study, in a neat dormitory rest, this has been our labor and student department is obliged to responsibility. (Half-heartedly, then brushed at the freshman) May I ask if you are..."
Freshman: "(Taking a step back) Ku... I've long heard of the great name of the Ministry of Labor and Welfare, I am here today for the position of cadre of the Ministry of Labor and Welfare ......"
Lao Cadre: "Good! You come with me at once!" (pulling up the freshman and walking away)
Freshman: "Go? Where to?"
Lao cadre: "Dining hall!"
Freshman: "(excited) Dining hall! (walks forward a bit and whispers to the audience) Wow, the Labor Department is the Labor Department! Everything is talked about at the dining room table! That's classy enough! (stops and shakes the hand of the labor official) Big brother! I'll follow you ...... But? It seems like it's not time to eat yet? Late, right?"
Lao Minister: "Alas, where is to go to eat ah! We're going to reflect the opinions of the students about the dining hall."
Freshman: "What opinions?"
Minister Rao: "You're a freshman, you probably didn't notice. Let me ask you, when you go to the dining hall to get your food, have you ever noticed that when the waiter tickles your rice or food, is his hand always like this, shaking... Shaking..."
Freshman: "(Meditating for a moment) Hmm... It seems like it's happening."
Minister Rao: "That's right, every time she shakes like that, she's missing so... One or two pieces of meat left." (Counting the meat that the person dropped, in a very distressed manner) (Khan ！！！！！！！)
Freshman: "(Indifferent) huh? Isn't it just one or two pieces of meat?"
Minister Rao: "Student! (serious) You don't understand! If each of us is missing one or two pieces of meat, then the thousands of students together will be a fat pig!" (made a pig hugging gesture)
Freshmen: "Ah! I'm sorry, bargaining is not my thing, you'd better go by yourself..."
Minister Rao: "Hey! You don't go ah? Classmate ......" (chasing after him off the stage)
Freshman: "(Khan ！！！！！) (goes on stage again to the audience) (how many times has this happened!!!) The Labor Department turns out to be a bunch of pissants! This ministry is not going to enter. Huh? These two men in front of us are very impressive, they must have some connections! (Runs up and blocks the front) These two heroes, I pay my respects."
Minister of Governance: "Oh, I'm the Minister of Governance, he is my assistant. By the looks of it, you are a freshman, right? Our rule and security department is to collaborate with the college's security department to improve the school's security and safety. Is there anything you need help with?"
Freshman: "No, no, I, I'm here to apply for the job as an officer of the Department of Governance..."
(The phone suddenly rings, and the assistant picks it up and hands it to the minister saying "Minister, there's a call for you!")
Minister of Governance: "Oh, you wait a moment, I'll get the phone. Hello? Yes, this is the Ministry of Governance, what's the situation? (Freshman curious to sneak closer to hear the contents) What? Two drug dealers are roaming our city? Nine dead and one injured on their way! (Freshmen look surprised) What? There is a possibility that they may be hiding in our school! (Freshman's expression stiffens) Okay, well, you guys notify the other departments, and I'll... Oh, I just recruited a new officer here, I'll call him right away! (Freshman fell panic and fled) you wait a moment. Hey how come people are missing ......"
Freshman: "(Super sweaty ！！！！！！！ Once again, ran up, to gasp) so close! So close! I can't imagine that joining the Ministry of Law and Order would be life-threatening... (sees a boy walk into the student union) Classmate! Student! Are you like me, wanting to apply for the student council? I advise you not to go! The student council is full of weirdos, either bitchy or petty, plus a narcissist! And it's life-threatening! Listen to me, don't go! Don't go!" (At this point, the four ministers took turns going up to the stage to greet the chairman, then glared at the freshmen and went down to the stage, hiding and eavesdropping, the freshmen didn't hear the chairman once and bent down until he had one hand on the ground)
Freshmen: "Ah Lord... President"
President: (President to help him up) "En, students, hello, I forgot to introduce myself to you, I am the president of this sector of the student body. What you just said is not wrong at all, what we student union cadres do is indeed some hard work, but as long as it is able to serve the students and help them, no matter how hard or tired it is, we will go to do it! (The four people hiding on the sidelines ran out and applauded, along with the chairman's sentence "I haven't finished yet" and ran down again) If you just want to get over the addiction of being an officer and you are afraid of hard work, I advise you not to enter the student union."
Freshmen: "...... President, you are right, with the various cadres just now want to compare, (looked at the edge of the stage) I realized that I am selfish and small. I go back and must be properly corrected, learn from them! (affectionately) there have been n opportunity for me to join the student union, I did not cherish, (suddenly a student ran up and handed him a napkin, the freshman took it and wrinkled his nose and said thank you back to the student, the student looked at the freshman with an expression of abhorrence) if God gives me another chance, I will definitely go to apply for (pause) the presidential department of the student union!
President: "Oh my god!" (stunned, four people together on the stage to help the chairman, all freeze frame)
Exam crazy cloud (school skit)
Characters: Ai, Xiaowu, Xiaoling, teacher
Scene: classroom
Contents:
Xiaoling lying on the table to sleep.
Ai drops a book next to her and goes out.
Woo comes in and sits in Ai's place.
Ai (coming in): ugh, man, it's inexplicable, isn't it funny, can't you see that I've already taken this seat!
Small Wu: ding is ding, dao is dao, in fact, I occupy earlier than you!
Small Ai: I came here early in the morning, why didn't I see you?
Siu Wu: I occupied it last night.
Small Ai: The last row is my patent! For it, I got up early every day, grabbed my head, blood flow, this position can not be lost!
Siu Wu: The last row is my pride and joy, this side of the feng shui treasure. To drive me away from this (Xiao Ai: - what?) I advise you to pull back before it's too late!
Small Ling woke up: noisy what noisy what noisy?
Early in the morning in such a sacred classroom quarrel, a waste of great youth!
Do you know what mistake you have made? What?
Ai: Yes.
Siu Wu: We won't argue anymore.
Siau Ling: The most unforgivable thing you guys did - waking me up!
Ai sat in front of Rei.
Small Ai: The last sound has to be, or send style. Dude, look out for me on the test!
Siu Wu: ah? Today's test ah?
Small Ling: Yes? My hands are numb today!
Ai: Scared?
Siu Wu: I slept on it, didn't I?
Siau Ling: All wrong! Tired of hitting the grass!
Small Ai: Ai, think I last night light lamps and oil tossed most of the night ah!
Siu Wu: Oh, you've been studying hard?
Small Ling: You also play small grass?
Small Ai: Which ah, I'm thinking of exam strategy!
Siu Wu, Xiaoling come over: think of what?
Smiling wildly, Ai: I'm telling you, it's a great trick!
Siu Wu, Xiao Ling: Come on, say it!
Siu Ai: copy from the book - (picks up the book)
Siu Ling: go to hell!
Siu Wu: It's a good idea! Why didn't I think of that?
Siau Ling: Come on. You call this a masterstroke?
Hey, to ease the tension, I'll give you a humorous quiz.
Ai and Wu ignored her.
Ling: Say, how many steps are there in answering a test?
Small Ai, small Wu to come over: how many steps?
Siaoling: in three steps!
First step: write your name on it. (The two nodded)
Step 2: Read the title over! (Both nod)
Step 3: - Hand in the paper!
Ai: Hand in the blank paper oh!
Woo: What kind of crap question?
Siau Ling: I'll give you another question; say, who didn't show up for today's exam?
Small Ai: Who can not come to the exam today? Xiaoling?
Small Ling: I'm not here yet!
Small Ai: Look around, Xiaowu?
Siu Wu: I'm here!
Ai: Ah! I see - Ai!
Woo: You came for nothing! It's not the same result as not coming!
Siau Ling: A, teacher chanting! I'm not sure if you're a good person, but I'm a good person!
The teacher walked in.
The three of them were shocked. How do you say not to come on the come? Aiya! (Noisy)
Teacher: What are you calling? Toad came in oh?
Three people laughed.
Teacher: Be serious! This test it! A little professional ethics are not! What's the most important thing these days? Score points, your lifeblood! (Evil laugh) Exam exam, our magic weapon!
Small Ai: copy copy copy, our best trick!
Teacher: Give out the papers! It's been half an hour since the test started! What's going on?
Send the paper.
Teacher: the test time **** two hours! You will not be allowed to hand in your papers for less than an hour! If you want to answer the questionnaire, please pick up your pen. If you don't want to answer the questionnaire, please rest where you are. Students who want to go to the bathroom - please restrain yourself!
Small Ai: I compare the teacher to a good one,
He's a rat looking for a cat to be a third party - an unreasonable request!
Siau Ling: That's right! Is he a legendary rapper, or why is his mouth chattering endlessly?
Teacher: Silence! You must be quieter than the trees! Do you know what a serious mistake you are making? It's heavier than the Salt Sea!
The three of them started copying.
Teacher: (pointing to Ai) This student please stop copying!
Siu Wu and Xiao Ling: I didn't copy it!
The teacher walked over to Ai: Please don't copy, student!
Small Ai: How do you know? I put it in my desk and copied it!
Teacher: The board in front of your desk fell off, I saw it!
Small Ai: (looking at it) Oops! What bad luck!
The teacher confiscated Ai's rolling paper, and Ai just wanted to get up and go.
Teacher: Sit down! You are not allowed to go out for less than an hour!
The teacher walked over to Ai, who took the rolled-up paper to his desk and copied it.
Teacher: Okay, okay, don't pretend!
Mostly despise you guys who cheat with books, no skill at all.
How did you just copy it? Like this? Like this?
Wu: Lower and lower!
Teacher: (confiscates Woo's rolling paper) You sit and reflect too, why did you cheat with the book?
Siu Wu: also do not want to take the book ah! Who made me not hit the small grass like her (Xiaoling)!
Siaoling looked at Xiaowu with wide eyes.
Teacher: That's right, remember to hit the grass next time! That's the kind of kid I like who uses their schoolwork.
Teacher: It's time! Turn in your papers.
Collect the paper.
Teacher: Good. Remember to come to the high math test this afternoon! (Down)
Ai: Ah! There's a high math test in the afternoon?
Siau Ling: Ah! I'll take the high math test in the afternoon! (picks up grass) What was the test?
Siao Wu: High ...... number? What kind of tree is that?
Three: Study how to beat the grass!
The teacher walks in (the teacher can all be played by one person dressed up).
Ai: Language teacher!
Teacher: Ai, how do you write essays! （
Small Ai: What's wrong?
Teacher: Read it.
Small Ai: "My Teacher", my teacher has a melon face ......
Teacher: Wait a minute, (took out a big sign, on which is written claw) you are melon face melon? What you wrote here is my teacher has a paw face!
Ai: Teacher, a claw face is a face, can't you just make it look good?
Teacher: Read on.
Small Ai: My teacher is so beautiful, so beautiful, so beautiful, so beautiful, so beautiful, so beautiful ......
Teacher: Stop! I'm not sure why you're writing so much about it, but I'm not sure why you're writing about it. I'm not going to be able to get the best out of you, but I'm going to be able to get the best out of you!
Small Ai: Teacher, isn't it required that the essay should be no less than 500 words?
Teacher: So you're just going to write about how beautiful it is?
Small Ai: Isn't it required to write true feelings? This is all my feelings ah!
Teacher: Hmph, tell you what, you only have 496 words!
Small Ai: Oh! Then add one more sentence: it's so beautiful!
Teacher: look at your translation of the ancient text, touching the acacia and die how do you translate?
Small Ai: find an old acacia tree and hanged!
Teacher: why the old acacia tree? Look at you to explain the words, explain the passing away, you even write go to death!
Ai: Oh, I was going to write died!
Teacher: (with a helpless face) You, you hung up again!
Ai: Give me another chance! I've retaken the course five times!
Teacher: Okay, I'll give you a chance. You've heard of blistering and swimming, right? You use the swimming edge to make a sentence, right I'll give you a pass!
Small Ai: swim - edge - have - fish? Fish ...... fish, fish swimming in water, swimming edge has fish ......
Teacher: (laughed) Congratulations, you got -
Small Ai: passed?
Teacher: (indifference) The sixth chance to retake the course. (down)
Siau Ling, Xiaowu: Forget it, come and study the high math grass.
The teacher comes in.
Siu Wu: Philosophy teacher!
Teacher: Xiaowu!
Siu Wu: Yes!
Teacher: Look at your roll of paper!
My question is: Here's the question, please answer.
How did you answer?
Woo: this is the answer, please give marks ...... not correct?
Teacher: You call that a question?
Teacher: you - well, the next one,
Expository question: what is courage, why didn't you answer?
Wu: I answered it!
Teacher: Just wrote five words!
Siu Wu: (reading) This is courage! That's right! Then I turned in the following questions without answering them, and how well I explained courage!
Teacher: You - you wait to hang up!
Wu: Teacher! Give me another chance! I've hung up fifteen times!
Teacher: I'll ask you two questions. It's up to you. ......
Siu Wu: Two - too many!
Teacher: OK, the first question is answered correctly! I'll let you pass without answering the second question, how many hairs do you have?
Wu: If only I were bald.
Teacher: Answer it!
Woo: 123456789 roots!
Teacher: How do you know?
Siu Wu: Teacher, I can not answer the second question!
Teacher: Good! Very good! Very good! Take (handing a piece of paper)
Siu Wu: This is--
Teacher: a retake sheet! (down)
Siau Ling, Ai: Come study high math-
The teacher comes in.
Siau Ling: English teacher! (Want to run)
Teacher: Siu Ling, what are you running for? You haven't had breakfast!
Siau Ling: I didn't eat--
Teacher: I saw you eat in the morning!
Small Ling: - tomorrow's breakfast!
Teacher: Xiaoling, look at the paper, you're not getting any of this reading comprehension right! Did you just look at the questions and choose them without reading at all?
Siaoling: No!
Teacher: How dare you argue!
Siau Ling: I didn't even read the questions, I just looked at the answers!
Teacher: And your essay! Why does it look familiar?
Siau Ling: How can it not look familiar? Reading comprehension of the first sentence of each paragraph spelled ......
Teacher: Xiaoling, you should realize! You this time--
Siaoling: ah! Teacher, I've hung up five, fifteen, no, fifty times! I can't hang up again!
Teacher: It's not that I don't give you a pass ...... this ...... for example, can you translate what evening dress means?
(To the audience) It's evening dress!
Ling looks at Ai and Wu.
Ai: Evening is night, right, perfect for the big game!
Siu Wu: dress is clothes, MM is always clamoring for them!
Siau Ling: Oh! Teacher, I know! It's night clothes!
The teacher shakes her head. (Down)
Siau Ling: No, I have to find the teacher! You two take your time studying it! (next)
Small Ai: never mind, the grass hit
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