I was the only one who didn't sleep, listening to the falling rain outside the window and sitting by the window alone. No drowsiness, no poetry, no feelings of galloping thousands of miles. I just sat quietly, listening to the rain falling gently on the roof, on the green grass in the yard and on my lonely heart. I am vulgar. I only know that rain is rain. I can't imagine what it looks like and what symbolic significance it has. This raindrop makes my heart very wet and I am at a loss.
This rain started after the hurricane that opened the sky in Pangu, right? How many years has it been raining? Insomnia, anxiety. How many years have I been sitting here? At present, it is clear that the ink is not dry after Li Liquor, and it is clear that the wind and rain in Xia, Shang and Zhou are still there outside the window. I just sit and listen to the rain. It's late at night and it's still raining in the middle of the night. The sound of rain is the sound of night, dripping into the sea and putting my heart in the boat.
So there was a boat carrying a sleepless soul wandering around, and a lonely lamp accompanied me back to spring, summer, autumn and winter.
where i was from? Where is your hometown? My ancestral home is my father's hometown. Once I packed my bags and trudged across the country. After saying many names, only one or two old people vaguely remember who I am. That scene made me deeply sad: the city where I was born is not my hometown, and there is no trace of me there; The mountain village where I was raised is not my hometown. I have a little memory. I flashed it repeatedly in my dream. I had a chance to face it once. They are strangers to me. He is fortunate to have the sigh that "the spring breeze does not change the old waves", but I can only be like duckweed, with roots and needs but in name only. As time goes by, I wander around and settle down everywhere.
The more homeless you are, the more homesick you are. What do you mean by "home in a broad sense" and "home in a subjective sense"? Especially for a woman who can't get into the family tree. However, how can you not pursue it? When the spring breeze in Jiang Nanan is green, the grass grows warblers, and the cuckoo cries blood, there is something called homesickness, which lingers and makes people sad. No wonder some people want to go back to nature and sigh that they have traveled all over the world, or that their hometown is good. In fact, this is just a wanderer's wishful thinking. What about your hometown? I'm afraid your feelings for her are less than one tenth. If you are a celebrity, that's another matter.
And I am a real woman without assumptions, so there is only endless cold rain outside my window, and my boat swings in the long wind and rain, unable to reach the other side. There are no big trees in my hometown and no cables on the boat. I can only sit quietly, listen to the rain, listen to the cold rain outside the window, and listen to the pulse, loud and clear again and again.
Isn't that the "light rain" that is "moist as crisp"? Breed the far grass color of "near without". There is spring when there is grass color, and there is hope when there is spring. My spring is old, the trees are green and thin, and there are no bananas outside the window. It may be a pity that I can't taste the classical charm of banana in the rain all my life. However, who can live without regrets? "He died before he could conquer" is Zhuge Liang's regret; "Carved jade fence should still exist, but Zhu Yan has changed" is Li Yu's regret; "The green leaves are shaded and the branches are full of branches" is Du Mu's regret, but when Xiao Du regrets, he can travel, sell wine, and point to Xinghua Village when his soul is about to break. Then, I can only sit in my humble room and listen to the rain.
Rough doors and windows, rough walls, rough roof. Only this moment's mind is delicate, and only this moment's mood is delicate. I miss the mountains, the sea and how the morning sun shines on my wet heart. Suddenly, a close voice broke into the eardrum, "Tick-tock ..." It was very regular, rhythmic and emotional. Is it really the dawn wave of the sun, breaking through the darkness and visiting us? I can't help listening, and I can't help looking around. I want to thank this creature who knows each other and promises each other. In the dead of night, I crossed just visiting, raised dust all the way, came to my room, came to my ear, comforted my lonely heart, and only accompanied me for a thousand years. Maybe I'll buy a glass of wine instead of drinking it ... Finally, I found that the white roof was wet, and there were three or four drops of water hanging on it, dropping drop by drop, which was sonorous and pleasant. At this point, I really hope this is an ancient leak. Putting a washbasin, which sounds like a leaking sound, echoes with the rain outside the window, echoes inside and outside, adding a little artistic conception to this time and injecting eternal music into my quiet mind. "Weicheng is facing the light dust and rainy city." It is raining at night at this time, and it is still raining in the middle of the night. Light dust has been dissolved in sediments and flows with water. Although I can't see the willow color now, I know the willow color is green and tender. The ancients still had such a mind, but I never had sunshine, and rain was not sunshine. Besides, no matter how long and how heavy it rains, there will always be a sunrise moment on the other side of the rain and at the end of the night to prepare for the dawn. Then why don't I read the night as a piano and listen to the rain as a song? Feel at home. When a person reaches a certain age, he will leave his parents' family and form his own family. Therefore, there is an old saying: when a man is older, he will marry, and when a woman is older, she will marry. This "marriage" and "marriage" constitute a new cell and "home" of society.
I am the kind of person who left my parents' home earlier and got married later. At that time, I went to work and lived in a single dormitory. I regarded the dormitory as a "home". Every time I go back to my parents' home, I miss my home very much. There are many friends in the "home", and I am not lonely at all. Use an ancient poem to describe it, "The guest is always full, but the wine in the glass is not empty." Every holiday, when I want to go home, my friends tell me not to stay at home too long and come back early. After coming back, it is naturally another "debauchery" and "a hundred schools of thought contend". I felt so good at that time that I thought I could live like this all my life without getting married.
After my sister got married, I saw a cookbook next to her when she was cooking. I can't bear to watch it do it. Because my sister is a nerd and a science and engineering student, she always gives people the impression of being detached from things. I asked my sister, can't people get married? Sister hesitated and said that when she grew up, her parents' love was far from being satisfied. This surprised me again. My sister who studies science and engineering can say such insightful things. My sister used to wonder whether Li Bai was a man or a woman.
At that time, I had not loved.
Later, I had my own home and changed from a woman to a woman.
My first home is my single dormitory. If I write the word "hi" in red, it will be a veritable home. It's simple, but I can handle it. Because everything used to be there, plus the help of colleagues and friends, it was enough.
When my husband and I went back to our original place several times, it was even more difficult to rent a house. All the belongings are just a pair of cheap suitcases and a small wine cabinet given by a classmate. I'm a little embarrassed that my friend went to see me. I laughed at myself and said I was family. My friend said unkindly that the four walls are not yours either. It pushed my poor vanity to the limit. But my friend didn't know that before I got home from work, I saw my daughter, who was under three years old, running out of the house, and said with surprise, I came out to bask in the sun and saw my mother come back. At this time, her father followed, and we smiled at each other. That kind of relief, that kind of touch, at any time, nothing can replace my happiness and pride as a mother.
As a woman, I have changed a lot, no longer smiling, no longer quiet, and I am busy between home, work and kindergarten every day. Shouted loudly for three times and four times, and urged twice, the husband and children were still indifferent. You can't help worrying, or you will be late for work. I will laugh when I see my daughter's clever prank. Haggle over every ounce with the vegetable seller and rice seller, and figure out that the money in hand is enough for a few days. Gone are the days when money was regarded as dirt and profligacy as generosity. A high school friend said, I don't want to see you now. You shouldn't get married. I said, why? "Too tacky!" That friend was like me from the beginning, but I couldn't explain it to her. Just like at the beginning, my sister just threw me a shocking sentence and went to live her own life. Some things can't be explained clearly. No one can resist the inevitable law of natural development, it depends on how you grasp it. Now, that high school student has grown up and reached the age when his parents' love is not satisfied. Someone is going to introduce her boyfriend.
Sanmao, a female writer in Taiwan Province Province, once said, "I could have been single all my life. There is not only one way for human environment and pursuit. How to live is a life. " But she finally married Jose, and the married life was very happy. This can be read from her works. After Jose's death, although he persisted for several years, he did not persist until the end of his life, ending his prime of life. We can only regret and sigh that we will never see her good articles again.
One day, I came home from a dinner party and was very tired. At the moment of entering the door, a kind of warmth arises spontaneously. It was after three in the afternoon. My husband didn't leave work and my children didn't leave school. I was the only one staying at home, and I didn't feel lonely at all. I can sit, I can lie down, I can relax myself on the sofa, in any position as long as I feel comfortable. This is home, this is your own home. Smooth ground, neat books and messy desks are the atmosphere created by husband and wife and children. This kind of atmosphere makes people quiet and peaceful, makes people see the world dirty, and makes people indifferent in the world. This is the shelter of life, the permanent post station after a long journey, and our confidence in being a man. With this confidence, what mountains and rivers can we cross? What kind of ditch can't be faced? Mr. Chai Zemin has a very good saying about the topic of home. Let me quote it here as the end of this article.
"Home" is a small house at the end of the sunset. There is a red fire, delicious food, clean bedding, a girl who calls you' Dad' in a gentle and sweet voice, and a wife who loves you. She won't especially compliment you because of your brilliance, nor will she discriminate against you because of your poverty. In front of her, you can always get a guarantee: even if the whole world falls, there is still an island for you to live in.
How nice it is to have a home!
Feeling proverb
Putting a washbasin, which sounds like a leaking sound, echoes with the rain outside the window, echoes inside and outside, adding a little artistic conception to this time and injecting eternal music into my quiet mind.