In daily life, the exposure of father’s shortcomings and problems will have different impacts on children to varying degrees. So as a father, how should we educate our children correctly? The following is compiled by me Let’s take a look at the correct way for fathers to educate their children.
The correct way for fathers to educate their children
(1) Fathers must have the awareness to educate their children
Fathers should not educate their children based on time, but should look at their brains Whether Li has this awareness and whether he has the responsibility to educate his children cannot be measured by how long it takes, because his social role cannot give him so much time.
Of course, the education of a father's role is more important than that of a mother. From a medical point of view, men's vitality is biologically weaker than that of women, and they are more likely to suffer from hereditary diseases. The vitality of social roles is also relatively weak. Today is a patriarchal society. In addition to social functions, men can easily give up in the family. When the couple has conflicts, the father withdraws. You make him realize that the father's role seems to be more difficult. The mother still has the instinct to feed the child, but the father seems to be weaker.
(2) Reflect the importance of the father’s existence
Since the father exists, and the children feel your existence, the key is that you still have to do your own things well, and existence itself is enough. . Because many things are manifested in you, and it is not necessarily something you do deliberately. It always involves what his true nature is. There are differences between men and women, such as aggression, creativity, and bravery. Everyone has a personality, but as two genders, they should never be replaced. It is necessary to fully display their respective personalities. In this matter, my father fully showed what he should show.
Until now, fathers are more creative, rational, and logically analytical, while women are more emotional. Some outstanding mothers use too much rationality to read many textbooks to educate their children, which may not necessarily be good. Mothers themselves are emotional. , the mother’s love for her child is too much. If you think about it carefully, this unconditional love of the mother exists, but it is essential for the growth of the child.
(3) Teaching through words and deeds is the basic way
One way to interact with children is to teach through words, and there is another way called to teach through words and deeds. Words and example will play different roles at different times. Psychologists say that teaching by example is a role model. How you behave, what your value standards are, and how you behave will have a greater impact on children than teaching with words. When parents talk about their children's growth, whether they have a positive attitude and seek self-development often has a greater impact on their children. No matter whether it is a father or a mother, if after having a child, while paying attention to the growth and development of the child, you should also pay attention to some of your own development and growth, and don't lose yourself, and don't only ask for your children but not yourself, then like this A father or a mother, a role or a role model may have a greater influence on a child. In fact, his words and deeds affect the children all the time.
(4) Set aside enough time to spend with your children
It is the father’s fault if he fails to educate his children. In terms of educating children, the father should have more strength, height, and thickness, and the mother should have more width, breadth, and depth. As a father, you can also feel that you have not done enough in terms of space and time, because you do not have so much time with your children. If you want to do it, you must get along with your children. If you do not spend most of the time with your children, you will not be able to do it. What effect it might have. Where are the limits of time and space? Men spend a lot of time outside, and when the critical moment comes, they are here.
But at least 15 minutes should be set aside every day to spend with your child: sit on the floor at home and play with your baby; help your child complete the study plan and cultivate healthy hobbies in your child ; Or explore with your child some knowledge and mysteries that he doesn't know. Be a "peer" for your child's growth, turn yourself into your child's good friend, grow up with your child, make progress together, and keep pace with the times.
(5) Give full play to the power of language
As mentioned before, "Words convey", in fact, education is not about talking more and less, but about whether it is exciting or not. When you hit the point, the child accepts it.
When your child encounters something unhappy, be your child's listener and ask for the truth. Let your child feel that he is understood and loved by his father, and that you are on his side and supporting him. A few thoughtful words will open the communication channel with the child's soul. Interaction and understanding with the child will become very easy, and the child will also open the door to receive advice.
(6) The division of labor between father and mother must be clear
As parents, educating children requires both division of labor and cooperation, so as to learn from each other's strengths and offset weaknesses. Every move of parents always affects their children's future behavior and habits. Parents can restrict their children's behavior in certain things, but at the same time, they should also allow their children to effectively convey their emotions. When you cannot do things according to your child's wishes, your child will lose his temper with you, and may even threaten you by crying. At this time, as parents, we should stand on the same front and treat the two with the same attitude. Afterwards, patiently explain why the parents did this, and teach him how to express his wishes and emotions correctly.
(7) The role of father in the Internet era
Internet culture or digital economy is more accurately called. Digital economy not only refers to network issues, but also includes the digital construction of traditional industries. The problem is that today's families are in the process of digital construction, or family education is in the process of information transformation, and in this transformation, the father's role is more important because the Internet is providing a An opportunity. A survey shows that in all families, the father knows more about household appliances than the mother, and the mother is slow in this regard. Today’s family education should be done online. Now parents should seize and ascend to the highest point of family education, lead their children in front of the Internet and information education, and do a good job in family education. If any parent does not take their children to start in this area, they will fall far behind.
Educate children to adhere to these 4 principles
Principle 1: Let the boy know from an early age that he is a great man
When a boy is four or five years old , he already has gender consciousness, and he already knows that he is a little man. At this time, parents must consciously cultivate his manly style: if the boy falls, tell him: get up by himself; if the boy is timid, tell him: you can Do better; when the boy makes a mistake, tell him: a good man does what a good man should do; when the boy is disobedient, tell him: not causing trouble to parents is a kind of honor for a man
It is worth noting that, The father's role is huge in allowing boys to have a sense of manliness from an early age. Numerous facts have proven that excessive protection and worry from the mother will reduce a boy's masculinity; while the father's stricter rules and looser restrictions will give the boy unparalleled strength and courage, thereby prompting the boy to grow up faster. For a good man.
Principle 2: Never be "hard" with boys, and be friends with boys
What are boys most afraid of? Obviously, they are most afraid of no one understanding and no one Support, and no freedom.
What are boys least afraid of? Parents with boys know that what boys are least afraid of is force and coercion. "The more they fight, the more aggressive they become."
Therefore, all parents of boys must keep in mind this motto for raising their children: If you don’t become friends with your child now, he will treat you as an "enemy" after puberty!
Being friends with a boy is actually very simple: give the boy more rights to make his own choices; share his joys, anger, sorrows and joys with the boy; respect your boy and give up the concept of "no success without fighting"; always let The boy feels your tepid care, clever restraint but not forceful control.
Principle 3: Don’t let your boy be too "rich"
What we call "rich" includes two concepts, one is too much pampering and arrogance by parents, and the other is Abundance of money.
Some parents are very fond of boys and depend on them for everything; some parents are very rich and give their boys a lot of pocket money; some parents are very capable and they take care of everything for their boys;
However, what will parents do by making boys too "rich"? Parents' excessive pampering makes them selfish and irresponsible; too much money makes them just Want to use "luxury consumption" to consume too much testosterone in the body, thereby forgetting that they still have to study; their parents' arrangement of everything makes them lose the ability to work, cope with difficulties, and resist setbacks?< /p>
Because of this, wise parents never let their boys be too "rich", they will hide half of their "love", and they will look for and create opportunities for boys to experience poverty!
p>Principle 4: A boy’s successful personality needs to be cultivated from an early age
In life, parents of boys often have a lot of helplessness: teaching him to be brave, but he always does things submissively;
< p> Teach him to be strong, but he gives up easily many times; teach him to be decisive, but he still procrastinates; whenever encountering such a situation, the boy's parents will always comfort themselves like this: "When he grows up, he will naturally understand?" "But the reality is often completely opposite to parents' expectations.If you expect a boy who has always given up easily to suddenly become strong when he reaches 18 years old, is this realistic? If you expect a little boy who has always been timid to become stronger, is it realistic? After the age of 20, is it possible to suddenly socialize like an excellent diplomat?
If you hope that your son who has been spending a lot of money can manage money like a financial expert after the age of 25, this is It can only be a beautiful dream of yours. No boy can live only in his parents’ dreams
Therefore, educating boys requires parents to guide him down-to-earth when he is very young to accumulate the ability and quality for success. I hope that every parent of a boy will be proud of his son and his amazing boy in the days to come!
All wealth, reputation, and status are only external appearances. Virtue is the foundation, and the saying that virtue carries everything is true at all. Why can you easily gain wealth after learning traditional Chinese culture? Because only by virtue can one carry wealth, and a person with a thousand pieces of gold must be a person with a thousand pieces of gold.
5 old rules to break when educating children
Breaking Rule 1: No messing
This seems to be a golden rule: children equal chaos. Children are a housewife’s nightmare by nature, looking at the empty cupboard and smelling the smell of the child, or when you see him painting on the mirror with your most expensive lipstick; Or, let’s imagine being with a child What can a neat white sofa be used for? Haha, isn’t it just a flat canvas waiting for you to doodle! So what should you use it for? Painting? The breadcrumb mixture looks good!? So When the time comes, you must start to collapse, right?
Waiting until the little one makes everything a mess before trying to clean it up will not only take up a lot of time, but also make you crazy. This is not what a smart housewife should do The way to choose.
A good way is to pull up a large piece of cheap cloth and spread it on the sofa in advance when needed. Even if you can’t finish the painting at one time, you can continue next time! You can also Appropriately limit the little one’s activity space, such as a room. If conditions permit, you can limit him to your own garden. But never deny any freedom. Although soil, water, and paint will stain the furniture, they will also give children a sense of creativity and happiness.
Breaking Rule 2: Don’t eat? Junk? Food
If you are not the kind of parent who is busy every day, you must have noticed through TV or newspapers that in recent years There are more and more reports of overweight children, which has triggered discussions and concerns about children's food and nutrition throughout society. One thing that is undisputed in this discussion is that junk food rich in sugar, salt, and fat has a direct impact on children's health.
Ideally, children should eat three family-cooked meals a day that include at least fresh grains and vegetables. However, most of the reality does not meet this requirement, and biscuits sometimes become a staple food on children's tables.
Young mothers often feel guilty that they cannot provide a better diet.
But please note: If your child can eat fresh vegetables and staple foods every day, and can ensure normal activity time, then it is okay to eat an occasional pizza or chocolate meal, and it will not be caused by intake. Excess calories cause obesity.
Breaking Rule 3: Don’t miss school
When I was a child, the happiest thing was that one sunny morning, my mother suddenly decided to take me out for an outing. That feeling is really wonderful, much more interesting than staying in a nursery! Ms. Li, who lives in Beijing, recalled to us. Ms. Li just turned 30 this year and has a 4-year-old daughter. ?At that time, my mother would take me to the beach for a spin, listen to the sound of the waves, breathe fresh air, and sometimes buy me an ice cream, which would be so happy. I want to be that kind of mother too. ?
Of course, you can’t just take your son out to play if you want. The school or daycare doesn't want you to do this too often either. But on some days that are special to you or your children, if the weather happens to be nice, why not try to take a day off? You must know that walking into the embrace of nature is also an important lesson for children. , no less important than ABC and 123. In addition, if you have to find an excuse for instigating your little one to skip school, maybe feeling nature outdoors can keep your child healthy.
Breaking Rule 4: Don’t play with food
This rule is what many mothers require of their children. Holding carrots in your hands as guns, smearing tomato sauce all over your hands to draw pictures, throwing eggs on the ground as toys? All these things will make every mother angry and anxious. Mothers most want to see their children obediently finish the last grain of rice in the bowl.
However, for a 2-year-old child, food is not just for eating, they can obviously also be used for playing and learning. Putting fingers into the bowl to stir food can help children understand the meaning of texture, shape, color, temperature and taste; they are willing to eat with a spoon by themselves. Although they will dance for a while and take another bite, this can also promote children's hand-eye coordination. ability.
So, don’t mind too much that the dinner table has turned into a messy battlefield. Put the rag on your hand and watch your child tossing his food in a down-to-earth manner, and wait until he is tired and hungry. When the time comes, hand the formal meal to your child’s mouth.
Breaking Rule 5: Just keep an eye on him
Every parent knows that children need and want attention from adults all the time, but this does not mean that we only need to pay attention to them all the time. That's it. For example, when they are playing games, we watch from the side; or when you are working, you look up at any time to see what he is doing.
More often, getting your attention only meets part of the little one's needs. You should also encourage him to communicate face-to-face with you. This kind of communication is particularly important for the relationship between mother and child. While practicing language, it can make the child feel that home is a very warm place, where he can speak freely and open his heart completely. If you fail to do this, the most precious and loving memories of raising your children will be taken away from you.
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