1, Seventh Master has seen the coffin.

Boss: "Is this inappropriate?"

Seventh Master: "Are you lying in it or me?"

Boss: "I'll get it out for you as soon as possible!" " "

Seven lords: "huh? Then why? Let me die quickly? "

Seven lords: I took off my shoes tonight, and I may not be able to put them on tomorrow morning.

Boss: Yo, I got goose bumps all over.

Seventh Master (pointing to the coffin): If you want anything, you need it first.

Boss: Hehe, old man.

2. Ma Liqiu: "Say! Do you want to lick shit or open a bank when you grow up? " Providence: "I want to open a bank." Ma Liqiu: "If you want to open a bank, you have to study hard!" The most ridiculous thing is that God's Chinese teacher was having a meal with noodles, and Ma Liqiu jumped out of this sentence and scared the old man. )

I can tell you that it is not bad for me.

4. At Dazhaimen (1), Bai Jingqi won the Jiaozhuang competition with Sun Qingtian in Jinan, and hurried to visit the kiln to find Hong Jiu. The teapot asked him:

"Why are you so happy? What's the good news? "

"Me? Leveled a grave and pulled out a fart curtain! "

(When Bai Jingqi offered to cooperate with Sun Qingtian, Sun Qingtian refused and challenged: Even if you start a business, no matter how big it is, even if my business is a grave, I will continue. Even if you put up a flag in Bai Jingqi, even if it is just a fart curtain, I will take it off. )

5. Yang Jiuhong: "Your grandson is catching up with her soon. Xiangxiu is only in her twenties!"

Jing Qi: "Yes, I married someone who is 10 or 80 years old. That's not a wife. I have to call her mom! " "

6. Look at the dark front, it must be the thief's lair. Wait for me to catch up and kill him!

7, Bai Jingqi scold Tin Muk: put your mother's eight-character spiral fart!

Bai Jingqi scolded Wu Belle: I squeezed your yolk out to feed the flies!

Dong Daxing: This fame is you! Bai: Fei Mingju? This is a fucking loser snack!

When breaking up, Bai Ying felt unfair: Second brother, didn't you say anything? White stood up slowly. Everyone looked at him and thought he was going to make a speech. He glanced at the third child and said quietly, I'm going to the toilet!

8. Jing Qi was angry with her husband and said to his mother: All the teachers seem to have just climbed out of the cemetery. They look embarrassed!

9, I don't know if I know it, two pennies to buy a fart ~

10, Bai Zhanyuan ran away, and a conversation with Bai, you said that a Japanese can speak such uncivilized Chinese-inferior!

1 1, Bai Jingqi: Uncle, I heard that you almost let foreigners go to Japan?

Bai: Huh? Ah! Misunderstanding misunderstanding

Bai Jingqi: Uncle, today is your day!

12, Tian Muer turned back to China-Japan Goodwill and didn't get married ~ You will be big after playing for a day! ~

13, Wang Xiguang: Master Qi, I will always remember your kindness.

Bai Jingqi: Grace? * * * Do you remember me when you slept with a bitch in your arms? I want to know one thing today. Are you a eunuch or not?

14, in the White House, up and down, inside and out, men and women, old and young, all fucking bastards!

15, great smog sticker, life without wine right away.

16, Dong Daxing, etc. Someone said, "Fight her, there are many of us."

"Who cares?" Dong said. Do you think this is a group fight? "

The third master scolded the second master: "Why are you worse than a girl?" ? "

Sir Zhong said, "Yes, I'm just not as good as a girl."

17, the world is cold, this year, something really happened, less timely help, more people were injured when they were down and out!

18, shouting at the sea: Jinan house! ! ! -Then clap your chest hard: Grandpa is coming! ! !

19. When Bai became the president of the pharmacy chamber of commerce, he talked with Yu.

Third Master Yu said, "I heard that the pug that Second Grandma kept when she died was cold and starved to death for three days. Why do I think you are not as good as that pug? "

The seventh master said, "The third master will take the blame for me."

Yu Sanye: "That is that you are not as good as a dog."

Seventh Lord: "I'll fucking slap you."

Third Master Yu grabbed the collar of Seventh Master and said, "I'll fucking hit you, Bai Jingqi. I have always respected you, but I don't know what happened to my family. "

20. Old Three: Why don't you study hard!

Bai: It's not good to imitate his uncle.

2 1, as soon as you give an idea, someone is fucking unlucky! ! !

22. Jing Qi: "I, Bai Jingqi, was born in Guangxu for six years, and I am 57 years old. I have a strong body and there is nothing wrong with it. Eating a roast duck and drinking an altar of Shaoxing yellow at a meal is far from death! But today ... I want to make a will! " ; "I, Bai Jingqi, was born in Guangxu for six years. Stubborn since childhood, out of control, there are private schools, beating brothers, destroying teachers, and doing all kinds of evil. When I grow up, I am even more unscrupulous. He lived a private life with his illegitimate daughter, killed German soldiers, made Japanese friends, and was finally kicked out by his loving mother. From then on, I wandered the rivers and lakes and started my own family business. A bubble of shit cheated 2000 yuan, collected 28 squares along the river, and created 32 secret recipes of "Dragon Horn", "Baosheng", "Jiubao Band" and "seven show" to save the world and the people and prosper the family. For Hong Jiu, for Sophora japonica and for Xiang Xiu, I have been in prison, which offended the whole family, old and young. The more I am not asked to do, the more I will do it! I didn't bow to anyone except my mother, nor did I bow to anyone! "

23. Tin Muk: "By then, the children will be in their seventies and eighties. How can they get married?

Jing Ke: "If you can't beat the Japanese then, why are you still alive?" .

24, the worm eats the mouse, the bare board is hairless, and the face is rotten ~ ~ ~ ~

25. Wu Belle was beaten by his son. When he returned to Bai Jingqi, he asked him what was going on. Wu Shuo: He was beaten by his son.

Bai said: don't curse if you are injured like this!

26. Xiang Embroidery scolded for a long time, and Bai stood by and said, "You are deaf." Bai said "I'm not deaf" and pointed to his leg and said "I'm lame".

27. You think of yourself as an onion. Who will dip you in the sauce? !

28. In her early years, Jingqi said to Huang Chun, "In spring, have a bite of sweets. . "

29. Aren't you his uncle? He is your nephew! He is my nephew and I am his grandson!

30, * * Guan Dui Ji Zongbu: No one dares to teach him. People want to live for two more years ... Have you seen it? What you want to teach is such a grandfather, who is generous ~ ~

3 1, Xiao * * Guan: It is as difficult to find a wife for Ginger as it is for my dad to find a teacher for you!

32. The devil went to the White House to find Tong Yue. As soon as Ginger opened the door, the Japs ran away.

Ginger casually said, "Japan, what do you see?" ? "

Say Jin Er: You should go to Lugouqiao, because the Japanese can't enter Beijing.

"He wants to stay at Shanhaiguan, and the Japanese can't get in!"

33. Old man: Your father and daughter really had a good time.

Qi Jing: Fuck you, she's my wife!

34. The third old man: "What is the life plan? Eat, drink and be merry! There are many rich people here, some of whom are rich. As long as they have money, they can do whatever they want-smoke cigarettes, visit caves, eat delicacies and wear silks and satins, and people can do whatever they want as long as they have money! ! "

Wang Xiguang: "Yes, yes, yes, President Bai is right!" "

The third old man: "but there is one thing you can't do-that is, you can't be a traitor!" "

On the way to Jinan with Huang Chun and Bai Jingqi, Bai Jingqi gave all the money to the rescuer. Complained: "People say to marry Han and wear clothes for dinner." Bai Jingqi replied, "I married my wife and starved to death."

36. money is a bastard ~ spend it and earn it ~

38. Xiang embroidery: Don't touch it! Seventh Master: I touched it with my eyes open. How can it be called groping? !

39. Jinan Prison

Yu Fen: Are you worth it for a kiln girl?

Qiye: It's worth it! I'd do anything for a woman, man!

40.jinan

Yu fen: take a step back.

Seventh Master: My grandfather said it well. Why should I take a step back? How hard it is for me to go further.

Shopkeeper: As the saying goes, a little intolerance leads to great mischief.

Seventh Master: My mother said it well. Don't make me put up with this tone. If I endure, I will bite you to death.

Shopkeeper: Old Sunman is afraid that he will die now.

Yu Fen: You will drag him to death.

Seventh Master: Who asked him to recruit me?

4 1, no one has seen it, but God knows.

42. "Get a guy!" The seventh master's leg lift is only one foot.

43. Shi Wen asked, "Jing Qi, recognize the words on the plaque.

Really? "

Jing Qi: "Yes!"

"Read!"

"Baicaoting Baijia old number."

"Read!"

"Baicaoting Baijia old number."

"Read it again, louder!"

Jing Qi shouted: "Bai Jia Lao Hao in Baicao Hall!"

Bai Wen nodded: "Remember, this is a treasure handed down from our ancestors! When did it also belong to the White House? People are on the plaque, it must not fall into other people's hands, remember? ! "

"Remember!"

Huang Chun: Handsome than me?

Jing Qi: Handsome than you!

Huang Chun: Here. ...

Jingqi: Don't pretend to be virtuous with me!

For a woman, this is probably the saddest thing for her.

45. Xuan Ying: "A child is like a bird. When it is caged, it has no soul. I opened it and ran away. It is not easy to raise a bird, and it is not easy to be a bird! "

46. Yes, you are absolutely right. Seduce men, but you won't seduce men into the kiln?

A dialogue between Xiang embroidery and Yang Jiuhong is so classic.

47. The procuress: How much did it cost us to eat and drink in that place! That's all the money on the girl!

Wang Xiguang: It's not yours, and you don't need to accompany it.

Old: Hey, Manager Wang, why don't you come to our place one day and I'll accompany you?

Wang: Don't be ridiculous, I'm not that lucky!

48. Bai Jingqi: If you are short of money, just ask me. Do you think I can give it to you? I hate it when people steal it!

49.* * Guan: A gentleman said that you are from Jinshan, and you want to live for two more years if you don't come to other people.

50. When the security chief and the propaganda captain come to check the pouring.

Master Bai Qi: Where are you from?

Governance: region

Bai: So you know Bai Zhanyuan?

That's our leader!

Bai: That's my grandson!

Hey, why are you cursing? !

5 1, I heard that Bai Jingqi was going to marry Xiang Xiu as his second wife. I was dumbfounded by her persistence. Bai Jingqi said, "Cripple, are you stupid? When you see Xiang Xiu in the future, you have to call mom, huh? "

52. "If you are wrong, you have to listen. That's my mother. "

53. Bai: "Dedication, owing gambling debts and losing character, owing prostitutes and losing morality."

54. When the Sun family in Jinan was seized, Chen Kaige said, "Hey! This boy is * * * broken. "

55. Bai: "The Lord is good to me!" "Lord, where is * *? ! "

56. Jing Qi: Don't people die once in their lives?

Coffin shop owner: To tell you the truth, you became a demon twice after you died.

57. The king said to Guiwu: Not just for a woman, but for you?

Guiwu said, Grandpa Wang, speaking of women, you don't have the strength to pull Le Er. Who knows this place?

Third Master: Go, how can you talk?

Guiwu: Oh, I'm sorry, it's full of nonsense, nonsense ~

58. Second Grandma knocked Qi Jing unconscious.

Yaping: Second brother, you are so cruel that you don't even pull!

Second Grandma: You are so cruel. You don't care what I did!

Sir Zhong (innocently): I remember you said never to let the children fall into my hands in the future.

59, a bubble of shit for two thousand two hundred pieces of silver is bad, really bad, bad you live bandit hahahaha!

60. Actually, I'm not afraid of what others say about me. Everyone is happy when I do one thing, but I am unhappy. I would rather not do it. Everyone is unhappy, and I am the only one who is happy, so I will do it. For everyone's happiness, I do things I don't like against my will. I feel redundant when I am alive! ! !

6 1, Yu Rongguang in the concierge, "How dare we live in a muddled life, where money comes and goes like a landslide and tsunami?" The porter said, "I can't be confused if I want to be confused." Yu Rongguang said, "You pee like a child, and money goes like shit."