Tianfa [2009] No.01
Notice of the Jade Emperor's banquet.
Immortals and demons:
Today, with our son Jade Emperor II admitted to Huaguoshan University, in order to thank the gods and demons for their support and love for our son, we decided to hold a school banquet for our son after the joint meeting of heaven. The specific matters are notified as follows:
July 3, 20001* *
2. What are the short messages that invite people to dinner in classical Chinese? 1. I have prepared a little thin wine to pray for labor and jade, and I will have a drink in my humble place. I'm going to be the host this Saturday. Thin wine is tasteless. I hope everyone will add fragrance. Fortunately, I am very lucky.
I thank you for your brotherly love for many years. I hereby decide to prepare some thin wine in the hotel on a certain day in a certain year. Please attend this small party.
3. Sending a message to say I'm sorry is actually not my will; Sending a message saying that I am grateful, that is my slip of the tongue; Send a message saying that there is a reward. If you don't give me money, don't hesitate. Send a message to say a blessing, just to invite you to dinner, treat you when you are free!
In this era of soaring prices, I suddenly found that eating alone is too extravagant: occupying a table wastes a lot of brothers and sisters. Would you like to save money with me? Let's have dinner together tonight.
5, eat well recently, remember to eat reasonably; Three meals a day are indispensable, and nutritional balance is the most important; Overeating is not desirable, not to mention dieting to lose weight; Friends get together to talk and laugh, and they are in a good mood to eat together.
6. I hope you have communication skills, and many friends are not lonely; I hope you have the ability to guide and be a management. If my wish comes true, you can invite me to dinner then.
7. I always eat fast food, work meals and business packages at work. It's hard for me to have a weekend. I should also have a good rest from my work and have a big meal together at night.
8. The wind is blowing gently, and text messages are flying everywhere. There is a party tonight, and I invite you to attend. If you don't accept it, you will be fined for being three cups late, drinking and not driving, so be prepared in advance.
9. There is a sea of people and a sea of flowers. I have a happy thing to tell you. Tomorrow is a good day, my brother wants to marry the bride; Brother, I don't know if you can be free, come and send blessings; If I don't see you tomorrow, see how I punish you!
10, dear friend, I heard that you had a happy event just now. You have to treat me to dinner this time. What? You don't know what a happy event is? They say you just got off work? Is it true?/You don't say.
1 1, the so-called friends are people who can eat together regardless of their joys and sorrows; Friends are people who can eat together for no reason. Let's have dinner tonight.
12, three years in high school passed quickly, and now we go our separate ways. For this reason, my family specially arranged a party and wanted to invite you. Let's get together and catch up.
13, since the last time we had dinner together, it left me with endless aftertaste, and it was hard to swallow it alone. I don't know whether it's because of your company or because I don't have to pay. All in all, I miss it. Why don't you come to dinner again sometime?
14, originally prepared a plate of shredded green pepper and a plate of sweet and sour pork tenderloin. I heard that you have a bad stomach and can't eat hot and sour pork, so I specifically told my wife not to put those. Now there is only a plate of shredded pork and a plate of pork tenderloin on the table. Please bring some wine and have a drink with us!
15, life is not afraid of plain, happiness is not afraid of ordinary, fantasy is not afraid of distant, wishes are not afraid of slim, friends are not afraid of distant, blessings are not afraid of frequent, guests are not afraid of trouble, are you free to have dinner together?
3. Ask for a funny version of classical Chinese. Mulan flies a plane. What kind of plane does she fly? Boeing 747! Ask the woman what she thinks and what she remembers. She wants to, and she has no money to buy a plane. Last night, she saw a military poster and needed bombers and 12 planes, but she couldn't afford one. Grandpa didn't have much money, Mulan didn't have gold and silver, so she was willing to buy steel planes from now on. She buys drawings in the east, screws in the west, glass in the south and tin in the north. She refused to go to the old hangar, no but I heard the general shout hahaha. Wan Li flew the plane, but never closed the mountain for a moment. The hot air spreads on the wings and the sun shines on the glass. The general is scared to death, and the soul of a strong man has flown. The son of heaven is lying in a hospital bed. The director turned twelve times and gave them a slap in the face. Khan asked him what he wanted, but Mulan didn't want to go into the cell. I want to drive 747 and fly back to my hometown. My parents heard the girl's voice and picked up the machine gun. As soon as Sister A heard that Sister Mei was coming, she raised her hand and raised her gun. I heard that my sister came, and my brother sharpened his knife and turned mentally retarded. I opened my cabin door, entered my plane cabin, took off my wartime robe, put on my flight suit, put on more grenades, and planted machine guns outside. When they went out to bury the bomb, their relatives and friends were surprised and busy: twelve years apart, I didn't know Mulan was going crazy. The madman stepped on the ground, the idiot's eyes were closed, and the two walked side by side. Who can say I'm not normal?
Haha, I want to eat KFC. I don't smell saliva, but I smell a woman's sigh. Ask a woman what she thinks and what she remembers. Women think of hamburgers, but women remember chicken wings. I saw the chicken coupon last night, and there was a big sale on the festival day. Twelve chicken coupons and a chicken wing. Grandpa has no eldest son and Mulan has no big brother. She is willing to go to KFC to feed him from now on. Buy hamburgers in the East Store, drinks in the West Store, chicken wings in the South Store and French fries in the North Store. When I said goodbye to my parents, I was by the Yellow River at dusk. I didn't hear my parents calling for a female voice, but I heard the splash of hamburgers. But when I left the Yellow River, I went to Montenegro at dusk. I didn't hear my parents calling for a female voice, but I heard the smell of chicken wings chirping. The more the Great Wall of Wan Li spans, the more Mount Everest flies. Banks send gold coins and emperors send sweaters. Hens die every year, and Mulan returns in ten years. Come back to see Confucius, and Confucius will sit in the sky. Twelve chicken coupons and a hundred baskets of chicken. Confucius asked him what he wanted, but Mulan didn't want to be an angel. She is willing to drive 1000 miles to send her son home. When parents heard that their daughter was coming, they went out to help the general: a sister heard that her sister was coming and wanted to eat KFC; I heard that my sister is coming and is going to eat. Open my East Pavilion pot, take my West Pavilion spoon, take off my wartime robe, put on my napkin, take chopsticks from the window and eat in front of the mirror. When I went out to meet the fire companions, I was surprised and busy: I had been wandering together for twelve years, but I didn't know Mulan was so greedy. The male rabbit's mouth is three valves, and the female rabbit's eyes are blurred; There are two rabbits eating next to me. Can you tell if I am greedy?
If you don't know, you won't know; It's enough to take the exam, but there is no problem; If you don't know in class, you will make a lot of styles; Self-study is the same as knowledge, you are all born; Born in China, died in China; It is possible for me to learn English. English is not qualified, which shows my character; If the math is unqualified, the teacher takes full responsibility; What should I do if the language is unqualified? Doing well in the exam depends entirely on isolation; If you don't do well in the exam, you don't know how to do it in isolation; Going back to school every day is even more scary, and the teacher talks about the wild. I listened like a sleepwalker, criticizing for no reason; Homework is like revenge, and doing wild things is like fishing for the head; Going back to school is left-handed, getting worse every day; Copy your homework, and none of the departments will hand it in; Go back to school and drink coke after school; Ring the bell and fly separately, another day.
After hee hee hee, the pretty girl is on the plane; I can't smell the dial tone, only women sigh. Ask a woman what she thinks and what she does.
Memories; Women have nothing to think about, and women have nothing to remember. I was really shocked when I went online last night; Twelve letters from my sister were all invited to the Internet.
Maybe next time. The beautiful girl is married and has taken someone else's surname; The purpose of surfing the Internet is to entertain ourselves and make new friends. Oriental version of leisure, western version
Write an autobiography; South to talk about heart songs, north to talk. Face up to the internet and connect at dusk; I didn't hear my husband call him his wife.
Sound, but the smell of insects constantly singing.
Once you quit the chat room, you will stop chatting. I didn't smell insects, but I saw invitations flying all over the sky.
Seeing her husband offline, her husband burst into tears; If you only care about Internet addiction, you are in debt. Ask the woman where she is going, and confess to her father.
Mother; Take a thousand miles to go to an appointment to tell your heart. Hearing the news of my daughter, I was anxious to hide everywhere. Sister, I heard that sister is coming, so lock it up quickly.
Doors and windows; Hearing my sister coming, I climbed up the east wall in a panic. Open my old door and move your arhat bed; Break into my old cupboard and search for you.
Password box. When you count the money at the window, go to the airport immediately. Seeing netizens thousands of miles away, their eyes sparkle; On the same network for a month, no
Do you know what a beautiful girl looks like?
Dinosaurs are shy, and pretty girls are puffed up. They are all chatting online, so I can tell what kind of person I am.
4. The funny ancient prose is speechless, and the bar lights are like hemp. Lonely people spill hops in the middle of the night and are still drunk. Don't be the smell of wine in their hearts. 1 _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Health A: There is a clear spring in my heart (the positive solution is "only flowing water comes from the source", so we still insist on water ~ ~) 3. Why should we cut the candle at the west window together? _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: The husband and wife sat in the morning (the Chinese teacher smiled when marking the paper.
After class, I fainted again! The correct solution is "late rain time". Mayfly shook the tree, and _ _ _ _ _ replied: I didn't move at all (the correct answer is "ridiculous". Quietly, wonderful, very in line with the facts. ) 5. The beauty of a gentleman as an adult, _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Also: both husband and wife go home (the correct answer is "but I feel the harmonious heartbeat of the sacred unicorn") 10. Sunrise in the east and rain in the west, _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Fighting at the end of the bed, getting married in the wrong sedan chair 1658.
The positive solution is "a thousand miles together") 13. Egrets fly in front of Cisai Mountain, and _ _ _ _ _ _ students answer: Climb the turtle by the East Village River (right) 14. I suggest that God stand up again, _ _ _ _ _. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Show your magic at the critical moment. Another student A: The mouse's son can make holes (the Chinese teacher in the whole office laughs wildly without images). 16. If it is sentimental, it will be old. _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: People don't waste their youth! (The positive solution is "If the moon is long and round, I don't hate it", and Li He's "Golden and Copper Immortal Ci Han Song") 17. If relatives and friends in Luoyang ask each other, _ _ _ _ _ _ students answer: Please don't tell him (the correct answer is "a piece of ice heart is in the jade pot") 18. There will be couplets in the final exam. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: You are a fool if you don't eat. No one has died since ancient times. _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Only 20 people died. The bright line at the foot of my bed, _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Li Bai's sleeping sound is 2 1. The correct answer is "visible") 22. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ The classmate replied: Wife, my wife and a man's wife (the teacher later said that the classmate was particularly dedicated, haha) 27. Think that year, Jin Ge iron horse, students answer _ _ _ _ _ _ _. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ "Student A: It tastes the same (the invigilator and the headmaster outside laughed). Senior one students in pairs, "Going to town to hug the mountain in the white clouds, _ _ _ _ _ _" Student A: I went to the hotel to hug the young lady to bed (his Chinese teacher almost vomited blood on the spot) 30. Two feelings. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: When they got married, it was 3 1. Qian Fan is on the side of the sunken ship. _ _ _ _ _ Student A: There are many kinds of flowers to be proud of. 32. You hate books when you use them. _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: There is not enough money by the end of the month. ) 35. I once tested Li Qingzhao's dream, "Do you know? Do you know that?/You know what? _ _ _ _ _ _ _ "The classmate replied: Sorry, I don't know.
The correct solution is "green manure and red thinness") 36. Once I tested a sentence from Mr. Lu Xun: "_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ If you don't leave, I will always feel good when I leave. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
There is another sentence, the last sentence: "Clear water produces hibiscus, (positive solution) natural carving." Some people write that mud gives birth to lotus roots; Some people are even more unique, and it says: Heroes in Gone with the Times 40. Ask how much you can worry about. _ _ _ _ _ _ Student replied: It's like a pot of Erguotou (the teacher criticized "You drank too much again ...").