Another year is approaching the Mid-Autumn Festival.

Every time I miss my relatives during the festive season, those old days engraved in the depths of my memory are instantly clear in the lonely night. Rush into a cup of light coffee, stay away from the noise, precipitate impetuous, and exude the past as fragrant as spring water. ......

As long as I can remember, my family lived in the old sports ground in Guzhen County, Bengbu City, Anhui Province. My mother said that I was born in the workers' hospital in Guzhen Old Street. To this day, my memory is still vague. I only remember playing hide-and-seek with some older friends in the alley of the old street. Whose house have we eaten a bowl of handmade noodles with shallots?

Many years later, the old street will be demolished soon. I came to the workers' hospital and walked through Shiban Hutong. An old woman recognized me and took me back to two empty rooms: "At that time, you were born here. Your mother is busy with work, and Aunt Zhu brought you up. " It suddenly occurred to me that my mother showed me a black-and-white photo of a thin old man standing with his mother in dignity. Mother said, "After work, buy some gifts to see Aunt Zhu. She took you when she was a child, but she hurt you. She often mixes eggs in noodles and cooks them for you in different ways. " Sanmao, look how fat you ate when you were a child. "

My name is Yang Chunyan. When I was a child, my baby's name was Sanmao. I was born here in April of 1973, and my mother was a doctor at Laojie Workers' Hospital.

Decades have passed, and I haven't visited Aunt Zhu after all. I seem to have been busy, busy studying, busy working, busy with a group of friends, busy getting married and having children. Those who were ignored by themselves in the past want to go back now, but they can't, leaving only lingering regrets in the lonely sunset. .....

I don't remember how I spent the Mid-Autumn Festival in Guzhen Old Street. I only heard my mother say that people in the old streets and alleys are next to each other. Their children will never go home empty-handed. In those days when materials were scarce, there would be two sweets and a handful of peanuts in my pocket when I came home. I think, at that time, on the Mid-Autumn Festival, my pocket must be full of candy cakes sent by my neighbors, even a handful of fried sesame seeds.

The family later moved to the old sports ground in the ancient town, and since then, the Mid-Autumn Festival has passed clearly every year. It was not until middle age that I walked through the world and suddenly looked back that I realized that it was a beautiful time that I couldn't go back, simple and warm.

I die every time I think about it.

In the old days of the old street, after years of rough life, I realized my deep thoughts.

Always in tears, back to the original beauty of life, thinking of the alleys of bluestone tablets; I think of my brother who took me to play when I was a child, and now he has disappeared; Think of the kerosene lamp at home in memory; Think of the wooden door of the old street, pieces of wood are embedded side by side in the groove, thick and lazy, like a forgotten book, recording childhood memories and the full moon of the Mid-Autumn Festival. ......

There are six people in the family, four sisters, brother, sister, brother and me. Grandparents are in Huaiyuan countryside. When they are old, their parents take them to the ancient town. The home of the old sports ground is the sports commission dormitory and three tile houses.

There were many children and grandparents, and there was not enough room to live, so my father built three thatched huts in the open space at the door. Because it is mud and the roof often leaks rain, the house has become pitted. My grandparents and my brother live in a tile house, and my parents, sisters and brothers live in a thatched cottage with me. Windows without glass are glued with plastic. The sultry summer with only a big cattail leaf fan is a bit difficult.

Autumn is coming, and the sky is high and the clouds are light. The most important thing is to have a good sleep and don't wake up in the middle of the night. Autumn also means the Mid-Autumn Festival is coming. Long after the joy of the Spring Festival, the Mid-Autumn Festival, the second most important festival of the year, has finally arrived.

There are many children and heavy burdens at home. Mom and dad have no time to take care of us in order to take care of grandparents. Grandma is ill. She has a bowl of spicy soup and two candy cakes all the morning. My mother never lets us eat them. We sisters can only watch. When I was a child, my meals remained the same for many years: porridge, steamed bread, pickles pickled by a big stone on a big water tank all year round. I can only eat meat once a week. My mother bought the kind of pork belly with thick fat, which was used for refining and put in a big jar. In the era of tight supply, the vegetable oil bought by the grain book was not enough to eat, so my mother used it to stir-fry and make soup. It tasted delicious when I was a child. So many years later, I had a whim and tried to cook soup with refined lard, but it was no longer difficult to swallow.

A dish with meat was expected for a week, and it was almost eaten by our children as soon as it came up. What my mother does most is to saute pork belly in pickled sherry red at home and put some pork belly slices in white rice, not to mention how delicious it is. Mother occasionally cuts a large piece of lean meat and puts some kelp in the pot, which is always robbed.

After the New Year, when I was a child, I was looking forward to the Mid-Autumn Festival, because we could eat meat that day, especially chicken ribs that we couldn't usually eat, which always made us yearn for it.

Father is very particular about holidays. Mom will prepare the holiday menu according to dad's instructions. Compared with more than a dozen dishes in the Spring Festival and a few boxes of steamed buns, there are fewer dishes in the Mid-Autumn Festival, but my mother always works hard. In the early morning of Mid-Autumn Festival, my mother will go to the crowded food market to buy a big basket. Every Mid-Autumn Festival, there must be roast chicken ribs at noon, then two fried dishes and two cold dishes, and a bottle of juice with a large pot of boiling water is bought back. This has become an unforgettable love for life.

At noon on holidays, the seats at home are strictly sorted, and grandparents must be the top seats. We can only move the plates they have eaten first. My mother is always satisfied with the sweets we eat, but in my memory, what my mother eats most is fried vegetables. She always said: vegetables are delicious.

I didn't know the warmth of my loved ones when I was young.

When I was a child, I always looked forward to growing up. I always like playing with friends, but I don't like listening to adults' nagging.

At that time, I thought that time would last forever, and the people I loved would last forever. Until the age of seven, grandma left, and nine years later, grandpa left us forever. The year before last, I went to my hometown to go to the grave and knelt in front of my grandparents' graves. The trees on the grave are already very high, and the grass is everywhere, but my relatives are gone. The thought of a large family sitting together, grandpa's kind smile, grandma's trembling and sneaking me a dime, has burst into tears. When I lost my childhood, I lost the most precious love in the world.

When I was a child, I had a heavy burden and my family was poor. I can't bear to buy the most important moon cakes in Mid-Autumn Festival. My mother can make her own cookies. The noodles were made up the day before, and after lunch, the noodles were already very good. Before rolling, my mother skillfully rubbed it on the panel, took out the sugar that she usually couldn't bear to eat, put it in the dough, squeezed it gently, rolled it, and then put it in the pot. Skillfully turned it back and forth, and in a short time, the biscuit was ready. At that time, I often picked up a piece and stuffed it into my mouth before evening. A bite of sweetened bread has become the most precious snack of the year. It lasts and is sweet.

After several years, I finally bought sesame seeds at home and put sesame seeds in sugar to make cookies, which often makes me feel terrible.

A few years later, my family finally bought salt and pepper moon cakes, thin skin and sesame peanut stuffing for the first time, so that I always eat half of them every time, and the rest will wait for the holidays, and then taste them slowly. Every Mid-Autumn Festival, my mother buys at most two packages of eight salt and pepper moon cakes, one for my grandparents and the rest for our sisters. Later, my brother didn't want it, so we broke the remaining piece into three pieces and tasted it carefully.

Holiday fruit, and then only apples and pears. Apples are my favorite. Until now, I often buy one from the supermarket, almost every day.

When my father arrives at Mid-Autumn Festival, he will definitely buy a sack of apples, which are crispy and sweet. After my brother went to work and got married, my father took out all the apples he bought from big to small and picked them in groups of three. My sister, my brother and I each get one, each with the same size, and each person has a bag. My apples are always eaten first, and my father always gives me more in private at that time, so I will keep them and eat them every few days.

Today is the Mid-Autumn Festival. I am too lazy to eat some moon cakes. There are more and more varieties, more exquisite packaging and more expensive prices, but when you eat them yourself, moon cakes are no longer as sweet as when you were a child. Few people bother to make cookies now, and it is hard to buy salt and pepper moon cakes. Even if I give it to someone, I feel that I can't get it. I would rather send it in a delicate gift box. I remember one year, I finally bought an old-fashioned salt and pepper moon cake at a street stall. I finally stopped eating half as I did when I was a child, and finally I was full at once, and finally I didn't have to share the only moon cake with my sister and brother.

But time can never come back, and those who can't come back together have happy laughter in their hearts.

After dinner, it's time to enjoy the moon. When I was a child, I didn't particularly like watching the moon. I always felt that there was nothing interesting. At that time, there was no TV and no cell phone. The whole family often sit together and enjoy the moon while chatting in the yard. Mother often says: the moon on the fifteenth is sixteen circles. I often fell asleep in the yard when I was a child. My mother always carries me into the house, covers me with a quilt and puts me to sleep.

Then grandma passed away.

Later, a few years later, grandpa left us.

Later, our family moved to the new gymnasium on No.2 Road. After my sister got married, there were only my parents, my brother and me at home.

My home is in the playground, and my mother grows grape branches in the yard. Gradually, the branches grew and the spreading green branches covered the vines. It bears fruit, and every Mid-Autumn Festival, the grapes at home are full. At that time, before the grapes turned purple, my brother and I couldn't wait to move a small bench, stand on the ground and reach for the green grapes.

In the blue sky, the clouds are light and the wind is light. Many years later, I tossed and turned in my life, often thinking of Na Yue, the yard, the grapes and the colorful autumn. ......

Later, my father left. On the day his father died, his life suddenly collapsed. On the Mid-Autumn Festival, there is no father on the reunion table, only a glass of wine and a wisp of incense in front of the grave.

Later, my husband went to Hefei to develop his own brand-new career.

Later, the child was admitted to the university and left home for Xi.

Now, I have been enjoying the moon alone in the Mid-Autumn Festival for several years. My father left us that summer, and now I don't even remember how I spent the Mid-Autumn Festival that year. My father has been gone for four years, and I still can't shake off my sadness. Although it is not the night of Mid-Autumn Festival, I often cry at the moon. I know how warm my home is, and my father is crying. I remember when I was a child, my father hugged me and sat on his bike. Think of my father when it rains, and come to school to give me an umbrella; I think of my father taking me to visit the newly opened Guzhen department store and buying me pencils and notebooks. I think of my father often proudly saying in front of friends: My Sanmao has good grades.

My father left, and in tears, I often regret that I didn't go home to spend more time with my father! It only took 14 days for my father to die from diagnosis. 14 days, my heart ached, and my father, who couldn't eat, left in a hurry without even giving me a chance to eat.

When I grow up, I know that life is not easy. I take my father's love for granted. My father even tolerated all my bad temper, but he always loved himself. From then on, on the Mid-Autumn Festival, there will never be a father watching us eat, only a glass of wine, a few moon cakes and two incense sticks placed in front of his grave ... On the stormy road of life, I only have endless thoughts.

Another year is approaching the Mid-Autumn Festival.

I haven't eaten cookies for years. Today's Mid-Autumn Festival, the moon cakes in the supermarket are colorful and dazzling, and the dishes are dazzling. Even if you don't have to cook by yourself, you can book a table directly in the restaurant, which is also a holiday.

Apples are no longer rare, and they often go bad when bought. The excuse is that they are too busy to have time.

No one has eaten the braised pork cooked by my mother. Mother often sighs: a little meat can't be eaten for a few days.

Another year is approaching the Mid-Autumn Festival.

Walk into the autumn of life. A person is still calm as water in the festival, raising a glass and looking at the moon, counting the quiet years, and those memories are flowing in the past, the warmth of the past and the traces of the years.

Another year is approaching the Mid-Autumn Festival.

Even if you are alone, there is still a bright moon in your heart, and you still share the bright moon and starlight with your loved ones, waiting for the breeze, waiting for the fleeting time and staying in the United States; Cherish every moment of your life and cherish the full moon.

Wen Yang Chunyan

Old photos provided by Yang Chunyan.

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