My mother-in-law is a single woman. It has been ten years since my father-in-law passed away and she is still not married. I feel very strange. The first time I went to my mother-in-law's house with my girlfriend, I was completely confused when I saw her. When we arrived at her house, my girlfriend didn't introduce her, she just asked me to sit wherever I wanted, and then went back to the room to change my slippers. My mother-in-law smiled and brought me A plate of fruit was handed to me, and I quickly stood up to say thanks. My mother-in-law is younger than my girlfriend, maybe because single women like to dress up. I went to her house and looked around, but I didn’t find anyone, but I didn’t believe that the person standing in front of me was my mother-in-law, because Really young and stylishly dressed.

My girlfriend changed into slippers and went out to buy groceries. I asked to accompany her, and she said, "The market is just downstairs." She would be back right away and let me watch TV at home. . There were only two people at home, my mother-in-law and I, but I wasn’t sure if she was my mother-in-law, so I stayed silent, and the atmosphere was really awkward.

Later, my mother-in-law asked me how old I was, and I answered 25. I also asked her how old she was. She smiled and asked me to guess, but I could only say: "She is about the same age as me." After laughing, she asked me again who was older, her or my girlfriend. In order to respect women, of course I said: "My girlfriend is older." My mother-in-law asked me again: "Do you know who I am?" I said definitely: "You are my little sister-in-law." The mother-in-law was stunned for a moment, then looked at me and laughed. I also laughed stupidly with her, and then I asked curiously: "Where did your mother go?" The mother-in-law said with a smile: "Are you afraid of seeing her? ?" I smiled awkwardly.

After my girlfriend came back, I heard her calling her mother and asking her to help cook. I thought I heard wrongly, so I asked my girlfriend in a low voice, where is your mother? Is she sleeping? ? My girlfriend was also stunned, and then said: "Weren't you still talking to my mother just now?" "What were you talking about?" I said awkwardly: "We were talking about your mother being my little aunt."

Seeing that I was embarrassed, my mother-in-law smiled and said to my girlfriend: "This boyfriend of yours is really stupid."

My family and my wife's family are neighbors, and the two families have always had a good relationship. Well, the middle wall is less than two meters high, and next to the wall is my wife's bedroom.

Since the relationship between my wife and I has not been announced yet, we usually date in secret.

One night after 12 o'clock, I climbed over the wall of their house to go to my wife's house. Their dog was very familiar with me. In my wife's room, as soon as I took off my coat and shoes, my mother-in-law opened the door and came in. I was so frightened that I jumped out of the window and climbed over the wall.

I guess she didn’t see who I was, but my mother-in-law yelled. Seeing me jumping into my house, she quickly woke up her father, thinking that someone came to my house, and called her again. He was yelling for my parents. I was confused at that time. The whole family was looking for that person. My dad even came in and asked me if I heard any noise. I still said I didn’t know. My wife's parents thought they had climbed out of our fence.

That night I saw from the window that the light in my wife’s bedroom was not turned off, and her parents didn’t come out of my wife’s bedroom until almost 4 o’clock.

Her mother came over to see my mother the next afternoon. She didn’t know what to say. In the evening, her parents had dinner at my house. My parents asked me to go out to eat several times but I didn’t go out. I dare to go out, but I don't have the nerve to go out. It's so embarrassing. I really want to find a hole to get in.

I called my wife to ask why your mother suddenly came in. My wife said she heard a dog jumping around and thought another weasel was coming to bite the chicken. Then I saw that the light was on in my wife's bedroom, so I came in to help my wife turn off the light. Finally, she saw that my coat looked familiar. She had seen it somewhere before, so my wife told me it was me.

In the end she became my wife.

My wife inherited her mother-in-law’s genes. Apart from being young, her height, appearance, fatness and weight are the same as her mother’s. As the new year is approaching, the mother and daughter meet up for a hair salon. It looks like the hair style is made by the same master, and the trendy bob haircut is popular at the moment. On the third day of the first lunar month, my family dressed up beautifully and went to pay New Year greetings to my mother-in-law and her family. In order to prepare a few dishes that suit my taste, my wife immediately put on an apron and got busy in the kitchen with my mother-in-law as soon as we arrived at her house, waiting for me to finish setting off the fireworks with the children. , a man walked in to see when the banquet would be held. He saw his wife's back facing away and was busy alone. He ran over to her and kissed her on the face. When she turned around, she said, "Oh my God!" Why is she the mother-in-law? As a result, my mother-in-law giggled like a normal person, and I was stuck there not knowing what to do. I found out later that my mother-in-law said casually: Miss, your dress is so beautiful. In order to honor her, my wife changed it on the spot and insisted on her mother-in-law wearing it. I was so embarrassed when I ate that meal? Except for my father-in-law who kept a straight face, everyone at the table looked at me while they were eating! ! ! ...

Text/Zhu Ge Naodao

The two most embarrassing things happened when I went to my mother-in-law's house. I still have mixed emotions and feel ashamed when I think about it...What exactly happened? Let me tell you slowly.

My wife has inherited the excellent genes of her father-in-law and mother-in-law, and is very beautiful. My father-in-law was also a handsome and handsome man, and my mother-in-law is a famous beauty in eight villages within ten miles.

In addition, the father-in-law and mother-in-law have always had a good relationship, and they are not too old, and they are both fashionable and trendy, but something happened!

I remember very clearly that that summer my wife and I returned to my mother-in-law’s house without saying hello in advance. But something very embarrassing happened to us uninvited guests. We saw something we shouldn't have seen - it was evening that day. My wife opened the door and found no one. After searching around, we pushed open the door of my parents-in-law's room and found: There were no lights on, the whole room was lit with red candles, and soothing music was playing. The father-in-law and mother-in-law were sitting and sipping red wine with tall red wine glasses. What was exciting was that the mother-in-law was wearing a stewardess uniform, black socks, and a stewardess hat! My father-in-law was only wearing underwear, tell me how embarrassing it was!

Embarrassed, we quickly exited the room and returned to the living room. I whispered to my wife, "Your parents are having a great time." She blushed and said, "Get out of here." After a while, the parents-in-law came out neatly dressed, their faces a little uncomfortable, especially the mother-in-law, who blushed and felt very embarrassed. She smiled and said why didn't she say hello in advance...

That's me It was the first time to celebrate the New Year at my mother-in-law’s house, so many of my wife’s family members, relatives and friends were there, and it was also the first time for many of them to meet my new son-in-law. During the Chinese New Year, I always eat a lot of fish and meat, which resulted in indigestion and stomach discomfort, so something happened, which makes me feel extremely embarrassed, shameful and ashamed when I think about it. what happened?

That day was the third day of the Lunar New Year. Many relatives came to my mother-in-law’s house, about a dozen of them. At noon, when everyone gathered around to eat, my stomach began to protest - one fart after a while, And it’s such a loud fart that I can’t even hold it in! In front of more than a dozen relatives of my wife’s family! I wanted to hold it in at first, but I really couldn’t! The terrible thing is, I tried to hold my fart in so much that I couldn't make any sound, but I didn't succeed! They were all loud farts, one for tens of seconds, thirty or forty loud farts in a row! !

At that moment, facing the incredible and strange looks of my wife’s family and relatives, I really wanted to find a crack in the ground and crawl in! What a shame! My wife later said that my face was redder than a monkey’s butt, and she had never seen me so red before after drinking. Fortunately, my wife is smart and quickly woke up from her confusion. She quickly explained that I had a bad stomach yesterday, so she helped me out and gave me a step down. Every time I think about it afterwards, I feel so embarrassed and ashamed!

Text/Zhu Ge Daotao

Many people doubt me and always say that I make up stories.

So today I will not make up stories, but tell the truth to prove that I can tell the truth occasionally!

I was the one who talked about my wife back then.

So the first time I came to visit, I took my dad there.

My dad usually drinks well. Taste the liquor slowly, there is a pound of it.

Because my father-in-law lives in Shangqiu, Henan, the local drinking culture is very strong.

So I told my dad in advance that when we get to the place, we should excuse ourselves from our health and don’t drink.

My dad was self-reliant on his ability to drink, so he waved his hand and said: "It's your first time to go to someone else's house, how can you do it without drinking at all? Don't worry, son, I know what I know."

When I arrived, my father-in-law My mother-in-law is cooking. My wife’s brother-in-law and cousin are talking to my dad. After all, they are hundreds of kilometers apart, so language communication is still a bit difficult. I was there to act as a translator.

While waiting for the food to be served, my father-in-law came back from outside on a 28-meter pole. On the back seat was a box of twelve bottles of bulk liquor.

My father-in-law unloaded a box of wine next to the table, took out a disposable plastic cup and poured four glasses of wine into it. (I went alone once before and knew that I didn’t drink. As for why I didn’t drink, it was after I was drunk by a classmate and lay under the table.)

Drinking in a certain township in Xiayi, Shangqiu There is a habit of starting with a big unity. So the father-in-law, brother-in-law, and cousin raised their glasses and drank.

My dad looked at the 2 taels and 5 bottles of white wine in the plastic cup (four glasses per bottle), and felt a little scared. But seeing them all do it, I had the courage to do it too.

Immediately afterwards, my uncle had to pay tribute to my father alone. My dad quickly said at this time, if we want to drink, it’s okay, but drink slowly, half a glass, half a glass, okay?

My brother-in-law didn’t understand what my dad was talking about, so he agreed to take care of it (tongzhong, ok). He raised his neck and drained the glass of wine.

When my father saw that his brother-in-law had done it, he had no choice but to bite the bullet and do it.

Putting down the plastic cup, I haven’t even put a bite of food into my mouth. The cousin's cup was picked up again.

My dad hurriedly swallowed the food, pushed my arm, and quickly translated my words for them!

I am also afraid that he will look ugly if he drinks too much, so I advise everyone to drink slowly.

My cousin is not very old and can still speak Mandarin. He kept saying that my proposal was right. However, since he is a junior, he must toast the first glass. My dad can drink half a glass. After speaking, I raised my neck and found that the plastic cup was empty.

My dad thought I made a mistake in my translation and glared at me. Then he forced himself to finish the third cup.

At this time, my father-in-law raised his cup. Before my dad could say anything, my father-in-law took my hand and said, "Tell your dad, I have a bad stomach, so I have to toast this first glass. After this glass is over, I'll drink it slowly so that your brother-in-law can drink it." Accompany your father with your cousin.

translate! ”

I couldn’t laugh or cry and translated this to my dad who was doing Tai Chi. After hearing this, my dad said that what my father-in-law said was reasonable. This time, he was so happy that he did it himself before his father-in-law did it.

At this moment, the mother-in-law brought a dish. When she saw that the round was over, she picked up the plastic cup and poured herself a cup.

I picked up the glass and stood up to express my gratitude to my mother-in-law. After the wine was gone, he pulled me and asked me to help him go to the toilet.

I thought he was going to vomit, but I just helped him to the toilet. In the yard, people started snoring and fell asleep.

I was so thin that I couldn’t help myself. I hurriedly called my cousin to help me to sleep.

The next morning, my dad went to the market alone and bought a dozen exquisite wine glasses as gifts for my father-in-law.

The first time I went to my mother-in-law’s house was after we got engaged. During the Spring Festival, the fourth day of the Lunar New Year, they treated me like a guest (qie three times) and set up a table early at noon. My mother-in-law, my girlfriend, my brother-in-law’s family, and my sister H. After sitting down, they said they wanted to drink some wine. I declined, saying that I was a light drinker, so I shouldn’t drink anymore. My sister H said I would drink with you and drink less. When I saw it, all the lesbians said they drank, so I said I would drink less. Oh, now that I think about it, I I shouldn’t have drank at that time!

About half an hour into the banquet, I drank about one or two or five, thinking that I would stop drinking after finishing this cup. After drinking, the eldest sister, second sister, eldest brother-in-law and second brother-in-law of my girlfriend’s uncle’s family came. I am a newcomer and wanted to have a drink with me. Oh my god, all four of them drank, so I had no choice but to bite the bullet. .

After drinking one cup after another, I felt dizzy. I don’t know how much I drank, and I don’t know how long it took. My girlfriend’s aunt and uncle came, and the elders came and wanted to have a drink with me. He had one drink, and I had three. Even if I couldn’t stand it, I had to hold it up. There was a large table of people pushing glasses to change. I don’t know when it was, or how much I drank. I vaguely remember saying that I ran out of wine in the middle, and went out to buy some. Then I drank. Well, the whole family also went to the yard to take a group photo.

As a half-owner, my girlfriend and her family sent my sisters and brothers-in-law away one by one, and then I said I was dizzy, my mother-in-law. Let me lie down on the bed and fall asleep. I'm so drunk that I want to vomit! When I open my eyes, there is a basin next to the bed. I don't care, I just vomit in the basin. I vomited again and again, four or five times in a row, but I still felt uncomfortable. Later, I lay on the bed and went to sleep. I was talking nonsense while drinking. One moment I said there was an airplane at home, the other moment I said there was a traffic light, and I was still cursing about the street, my aunt and I. My sisters even came to see me, and when they saw how embarrassed I was, they started giggling.

Seeing that I still felt uncomfortable despite having vomited so many times, my mother-in-law and her family were worried and started making honey water again. , soaked in apple water, and didn’t eat much for dinner afterwards.

I didn’t go home at night and slept at my girlfriend’s house. My mother-in-law was open to it and let my wife and I share a room together at midnight. At around two o'clock, I woke up, went to the toilet, saw my girlfriend, and did something indescribable.

Later I learned that my girlfriend’s family is a big family, and every new son-in-law must undergo a drinking test, and that meal was specially arranged. That is to say, during that meal, my girlfriend and her family commented that I was honest, reliable, and quite satisfied. But it was really embarrassing. I drank too much at my mother-in-law’s house and acted like crazy. I felt ashamed.

I was playing skewers with my girlfriend. After playing skewers, I was a little drunk. My girlfriend insisted on letting me go to her house. I didn’t prepare anything and didn’t take anything. It was the first time I came to her door so recklessly. It was a mess when there were so many people in the house. My girlfriend’s sister and her brother-in-law got angry. They took the kids home and the brother-in-law drove up after them and apologized. All the family and relatives criticized me! !