Female: Because you are handsome.

Man: Handsome and can not be eaten.

Female: But not handsome, then, to the will not be able to eat

2, Q: Are you happy?

A: My last name is Fu.

Q: Why are you happy?

A: Because my father's last name is Fu.

Q: Why are you happy if your dad is happy?

A: Because ... I'm pro-life.

3. Wife: "You say, do I look pretty?"

Husband: "That goes without saying, of course it's prettier than anyone else!"

Wife: "But when we got married, my mom only received a few hundred dollars for the bride price you say this means what?"

Husband: "It shows that things are cheap!"

4, the senior said: "male to female ratio of 3 to 1!"

We replied: " a couple a pair of base."

5, an old man died before not assured that the old partner, will be called to the old partner in front of said: "old partner ah, I'm sorry for you ah, in the days of my marriage to you, I have an extramarital affair". Unexpectedly, my old partner came out with a sentence: "It's okay, you can go in peace. You see which of our several children look like you."

6, first buy a bottle of Kangshifu Jasmine Tea.

Drink half of it and add water (until it's full) and it becomes Jasmine Tea.

Drink half of it again, add water, and it becomes Jasmine Tea Unsweetened.

Drink half of it again, add water, and it becomes Nongfu Shanshanquan a bit sweet.

Drink another half, add water, and it becomes Nongfushanquan.

7, boss: sell socks ah! Three dollars a pair of ah!

I: cheaper, ten dollars for three pairs!

Boss: my price is more than this number ah, can not sell ...

8, one day, the wife did a good job of cooking, said to her husband: "How about shredded pork with fish?" "Almost." "What about sweet and sour pork?" "General." "Saying a good word will kill you!" "The rice is so hard today."

1, a classmate, especially love to fart, and are with the tone, to the evening study is very quiet when he came to a cold, a few times later, the language teacher finally angry, a slap on the table and said, "you can not transport a gas to transport it into a burp to play up!"

2, a student return home in the fall is not as good as, was asked to write a fall composition. So I made up: today I went home, sweet potatoes are ripe, hanging in the branches swaying with the wind ......

3, my son asked me: "What do you mean by half the work?"

I explained: "People because of the right way to do things, only half the effort, received double the results."

My son nodded and said, "Just like the neighbor's aunt who had twins all at once but was twice as productive, right?"

4, husband: "If I do something cheating in the future you will forgive me?"

Wife: "I will just castrate you!"

Husband: "Don't! That one must be saved for me!"

Wife: "Don't worry I'll save it for you."

Husband: "Then I'm relieved."

Wife: "Don't worry, leave it in the bottle!"

5, a certain street there is a beggar, every day there to beg for a living. One day someone suddenly found a beggar around more than a bowl can no one? Then went up to ask: "Why do you put two bowls". The beggar smiled and said: "Ya, I do not know how to drop the recent business is very good. So opened a branch."

6, the Monkey King was brought to the Royal Horse Guards by Taibai Jinxing: "Pil Ma Wen, these horses in the future please you." "Wait a minute! Where are the horses?" The Monkey King looked at the empty sea of clouds and screamed strangely. "Look closely, aren't they all there?" "I only see a bunch of floating clouds!" "That's right then, God's horses are all floating clouds."

1. Cousin: why is the sun always shining on me?

His mother: because you are the flower of the motherland ah.

His father: is a flower on the good study, good development, do not grow into a oddball later.

2, the girlfriend ate bad stomach, the result of abdominal pain unbearable, and I said: "can't, my stomach hurts too much, I want to give birth to your child" I froze for a moment, said: "you do not talk nonsense ah, where is my child, it is clearly your child with the rice and a name! The name is Shit ......"

3. Stomach ache, want to vomit. The morning exam, halfway through the exam, can not hold back vomit. The teacher came over and said with concern: "How, the question is too disgusting?"

4, withered old trees and crows,

School cafeteria prices,

Students starving into a thin horse,

Sunset,

Ma Ma I want to go home.

5. The night is long and I'm afraid of dreaming too much, so if you take it off, I'll take it off.

6, almost all of the love is to "hello" to start, to "hello bad" sublimation, to "hello great" into hot love, to "How are you" fades, to "are you okay" end.

7. Youth: "I want to have a lot of money."

Zen master: "As long as you can find seven balls, your wish can will come true."

Youth: "You mean the seven dragon balls?"

The Zen master shook his head, "No, the two-colored balls..."